


New Year's Resolution

by mikaonashi



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Attempt at Humor, M/M, Romantic Comedy, Side Dojae, luwoo and johnten are mentioned, may add tags and characters as the story progresses, sicheng is whipped
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-20
Updated: 2019-02-23
Packaged: 2019-09-23 15:11:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 28,988
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17082686
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mikaonashi/pseuds/mikaonashi
Summary: New Year's Eve is the moment to make resolutions, decide to change what is wrong and start afresh.Dong Sicheng is not one to really believe in New Year's traditions. However, after a series of bad flings and relationships - ending the year with him making a completely fool out of himself -, Sicheng is determined. For his New Year's resolution he promises to not get involved with anyone.But sometimes resolutions are just meant to be broken.





	1. Boring

 

Dong Sicheng was bored.

 

He was sitting on the couch of someone’s else house. Watching as everyone around him was getting drunk and having the time of their life, while he held on to a sad cup of orange juice.

 

You see, it’s not that Dong Sicheng didn’t like partying or drinking. He did. But being enable to drink thanks to antibiotics was a sour punch, especially during New Year’s Eve when everyone was partying and he couldn’t get himself to drink even a single glass of alcohol. So, being a sour asshole, he thought the whole party sucked.

 

To begin with he didn’t even want to go. But Jaehyun assured him it would be fun, this guy from DoYoung’s job had just moved to a huge house and decided that it would be perfect to throw a housewarming party together with a New Year’s Eve party, “kill two birds it one stone” he said. The guy invited Doyoung, who – of course – would bring Jaehyun, his boyfriend. And Jaehyun, being the good best friend he was, decided to bring Sicheng with the promise of spending new year’s together.

 

As if.

 

It didn’t take ten minutes into the party for Doyoung to want to present Jaehyun to some of his co-workers, dragging his boyfriend away and leaving Sicheng to stand by himself in the middle of a very boring decorated living room.

 

Everything was gray. The walls, the couch, the cushions; a whole house straight out from 50 shades of gray – without the bdsm, only the pg parts of it -.

 

And normally Sicheng wouldn’t care less about someone’s else house décor – his own apartment had none, just a whole mess and mix of his and Renjun’s stuff all over the place. But he didn’t know anyone in that party – beside Doyoung and Jaehyun, of course – and he was bored beyond his mind after thirty minutes sitting on the couch, trying to get himself busy with cellphone games and judging the world.

 

Renjun was also another reason why Sicheng was in a bad mood that night. Normally he would spend New Year’s Eve with his baby brother, after all they spent it together since Renjun was born, nineteen years ago. But no, his baby brother had grown up and now went to parties of his own – he was a college boy –, so Sicheng wasn’t that surprised when Renjun came to him one afternoon and said he was going to spend New Year’s Eve with his friends.

 

Sicheng knew it was coming, but still hurt to be traded for cheap booze.

 

So, it was easy to see why he wasn’t exactly having much fun that night. Which really sucked. After all, it was the last night of the year, holiday season it’s supposed to be fun, but Sicheng had already embraced loneliness and decided that he would spend the whole night judging people. From the house owner to his best friends, who were too in love and having fun together to remember him.

 

Fuck love.

 

Also, maybe - but just maybe - there was a third reason for Sicheng sourness.

 

He was _alone_.

 

While everyone he knew was spending the holiday with the people they loved – maybe even his baby brother, who knew? He never told him those things -, Sicheng was all by himself, having to stuck together with his not-single friends.  

 

It had been a while since his last relationship: a cute guy from Tinder with whom he had sex more times than had dates. So maybe not a real relationship, more of a friends with benefits type of relationship. But without the friendship. And without the dates. Because who was Sicheng kidding, being taken to a McDonalds drive thru before going to a cheap motel didn’t count as romantic dinner.

 

So maybe Sicheng hasn’t had a real relationship in a long time and he felt a little jealous of his friends. Jaehyun and Doyoung had each other; a five years long relationship that started back in university days when Doyoung bumped into Jaehyun at a coffee shop, spilling his coffee all over the others shirt. What could be a complete awful situation, turned into a cliché love story: both fell in love the moment they looked at each other, exchanging numbers and a promise to meet again at the coffee shop. The whole story was straight out of some shitty and cliché romcom movie, but Sicheng still envied them. He could barely get his name to be written right on his order cup at a coffee shop, much less get a hot ass boyfriend.

 

On the other side of the relationship spectrum was Jungwoo, his second-best friend. Jungwoo had just secured himself a new boyfriend – after spending one week single -, a rich guy named Lucas, who was now taking him on a trip around Europe. If Sicheng wasn’t already jealous enough, seeing Jungwoo constant Instagram posts with his new Louis Vuitton’s bags and Gucci clothes, made Sicheng green with envy.

 

But it wasn’t like Sicheng resented his friends. He was happy for them, happy that they found someone who liked them and got themselves a great relationship. But he couldn’t control the little green monster inside him, grumbling with jealous over everyone finding true love while he spent his nights by himself, watching marathons of Discovery Home and Health tv shows while waiting for Renjun to come back drunk from some party.

 

All Sicheng wanted was a hot ass rich smart boyfriend. Was that so much to ask?

 

He sighed, taking another sip on his boring orange juice at this boring party in this boring house. For real, not even the music that was being played was exciting, just some over pretentious indie music, too hipster for Sicheng love for very mainstream pop music.

 

There was still another hour until midnight, one hour until the new year. Maybe he would stick around until after the countdown, just to wish his friends a happy new year before going back home.

 

One more hour. He had to get himself entertained for another hour.

 

His phone battery was already screaming in red at 15%, so no more games. He had no other choice beside finding something else to do. Sicheng looked around, trying to see if there was something he could do, someone friendly enough and alone to start a conversation – god forbids him of joining an already formed group of people talking, he had no social skills for that -.

 

In the end, what he found was a little magazine rack, right beside the television rack. All the magazines were business related, the most awful and boring collection of magazines Sicheng had ever laid eyes on. But then, again, the owner of this house was the most boring person Sicheng have never met. Boring house and boring magazine taste.

 

But he didn’t have much choice in that moment, going to the rack and picking a magazine before returning back to the sofa, ready to spend the next hour trying to wrap his head around difficult economic related articles.

 

He had just opened the first page – regret taking over his body – when a voice took his attention away from the page.

 

“Wow, you must really bored if you are willing to read now.” The voice was filled with amusement, Sicheng didn’t even have to look up to see that this person was smirking, certainly thinking he was a weirdo.

 

Sicheng was ready reply, a sarcastic comeback on the tip of his tongue. But as he finally looked up, he was meet with the hottest guy he had ever seen in his poorly twenty-six years old life.

 

Dark brown hair, a smirk really was gracing his lips – and Jesus those lips, Sicheng maybe took a few more seconds staring at it than he was proud to admit it -. Hot Gut was wearing a simple black shirt and even more simple black jeans, casual, but still so fucking hot. The fashion industry created black shirts and jeans for this guy to own it.

 

For fucks sake, the world hot was created and added to the dictionary next to a photo of this guy.

 

And Sicheng knew he was being a creep. He was staring at this guy, enable to answer him - the words stuck on his throat -, making the foulest out of himself in front of a hot guy.

 

Maybe lady luck finally decided to grace him, because Hot Gut laughed at his lack of composure. Sitting right beside him, resting his drink on the coffee table right in front of them. A cup of whisky, very adult like, very chic, so very sexy. Sicheng was glad he was already sitting on the sofa, because he could feel his legs turning into jelly as their knees touched for a brief second, as the guy made himself comfortable next to him at the sofa.

 

“Not much of a party guy      ?” Hot Gut asked, pointing at the magazine on one of Sicheng’s hands and the orange juice on the other.

 

It was only then that he thought about how awfully boring he probably looked right now. Boring drink, boring magazine, boring party guest. Not even his clothes – normally more colourful, a mix of light colors – helped him look more interesting, the contrary, the white shirt with a black jacket mixing well with the boring gray background.

 

The idea of this hot stranger thinking he was some sort of serious business guy who worked at Doyoung’s company made him snort. As in literally snort. “Oh, God no!” Maybe it was the way he said it, maybe it was him throwing the magazine on the coffee table as if it was on fire, but something made Hot Gut laugh. And Sicheng felt really proud of it. Because the guy wasn’t only hot, he was super handsome and his smile made Sicheng’s poor heart skip a few beats. He decided he wanted to see Hot Gut smile more. “I love parties! Love my good old cocktails! Buuuut unfortunately I’m taking some antibiotics.”

 

Hot Gut didn’t stop smiling. He also didn’t stop looking at Sicheng, never breaking eye contact. “And the magazine?”

 

“That?” Sicheng’s voice dripped with disgust as he pointed at the magazine, the action making Hot Gut once again laugh. “I would never read that. Never in a million of years, just no!” For a second he asked himself if he was sounding too harsh, too sarcastic – Jungwoo once warned him that he needed to tone down a little bit when flirting, and Jungwoo was the king of flirting so he was definitely right. But Hot Gut didn’t even blink at his answer, smile still gracing his perfect hot lips.

 

 _God_ , he was so hot.

 

“And why would you _never in a million years_ read it?” Hot Gut imitated his tone, making fun of him. He looked and sounded amazingly amused with Sicheng’s sour existence.

 

“Isn’t it obvious? It’s so damn boring!” It hit Sicheng that the guy probably worked at Doyoung’s company and was also invited by the house owner. The company was a business related one, very typical cubicle offices with lots of people analyzing data and numbers that Sicheng would never be able to comprehend. So, if Hot Gut worked there, it meant he likely didn’t find those magazine boring. _Shit_. “I-I mean, it’s boring for me, you know? I don’t like it, but if you do, go you!” He finished by raising his fist ups, like a shy fighting, like a complete idiot trying to not sound like the judgmental asshole he knew he was. Holding his breath and hoping he didn’t offend the other. He was in no position to offend hot guys who were willing to talk to him.

 

But once again Sicheng was blessed with laughter, allowing him to breath in relief once again. “You don’t need to get so nervous, its ok! I also think it’s really boring, important for work, but boring.” Hot Gut leaned against the couch, completely relaxed and body turned into Sicheng’s direction, his full attention on him. “So, my first impression of you was right. You are really bored if you are willing to read it.”

 

“Was.” Sicheng quickly answered, making Hot Gut raise his eyebrow in confusing. “Was bored.” The confusion disappearing from the other face, replaced once again by the smirk. Smooth, Sicheng, real smooth.

 

“Not really enjoying the party? I noticed you have been here on this sofa for a while now.” The revelation that Hot Gut had noticed him before talking to him made Sicheng’s heart do backflips inside his chest. But he had to get his shit together, look collected, cool, the guy was clearly interested and Sicheng couldn’t let this chance pass.

 

“I came with my friends, but they left me alone and I don’t know anyone else here…” He shrugged his shoulders, pretending it wasn’t a big deal and he wasn’t being a sour bitch a few minutes before.

 

“Why didn’t you try meeting new people?” Hot Gut reached for his whisky glass, taking a sip and keeping the drink in hand. He looked so sexy with it, it was a whole image and Sicheng stare may have not gone unnoticed by the other.

 

“I just- I don’t work at the company and I don’t think I fit with anyone here? All serious business people, wearing suits and pretending to be fun while getting drunk- No offence!” He quickly added the last part, noticing what he said without thinking too much about it. Too judgmental, he could hear Jungwoo’s voice pointing out in his head.

 

“No offence taken! Really, you can stop worrying, just relax ok?” Hot Gut voice was very comforting while saying those words, using his free hand to pat the back of the sofa, silently telling Sicheng to lean against it like him, completely relaxing there. Which was hilarious in Sicheng’s mind, because by doing that he would be closer to the guy and that would make him a completely mess inside.

 

Yet, he still leaned over the back of the sofa, watching as Hot Gut smiled, content at his actions. “So, what do you do? What is your non-serious work?”

 

“I’m a choreographer!” There was no better way to make Sicheng 100% comfortable that letting him talk about his job. He loved what he did and could talk for hours and hours nonstop. It was the perfect change of topic. “I work at this really famous dance studio. I don’t wanna sound like I’m bragging, but we work with some really huge and famous groups. Do you know NCT?” Hot Gut was shaking his head, as a no. “Oh, well, they are this really popular group right now. One of my bosses did their choreographies since debut, but for the past three releases me and another co-worker did it!” He was proud of himself for his job, smiling from ear to ear. It was a dream come true.

 

His smile had an immediate effect on Hot Gut, who smiled just as bright, shifting his position on the sofa and getting slighter closer. “No wonder you feel like you don’t fit with the people here, we have completely opposite jobs.” He placed his elbow on the sofa as his head now rested on his hand. “So, you must listen a lot to the groups you choreograph for, no? Don’t you get tired of listening to the same song over and over again?”

 

“Yes and no. I like the type of music we work with at the studio and even if it happens for me to not like a song, by the end of the work I have listened so much to it that it grew on me. And yeah, I can get a little tired of a song, but only for a while, it’s hard to stay away from good music!” Hot Gut seemed to agree, nodding.

 

“I guess you don’t really listen to this type of music then?” He waved the hand that held the whisky glass, gesturing at the party and the music playing on it. Sicheng probably made a little judging face, because Hot Gut laughed. “Ok, got it. Why don’t you like it?”

 

“It’s boring!” Sicheng really felt more comfortable now, because he didn’t feel even a little bit of regret as he spoke his honest opinion on the house owner music taste. “It feels so pretentious, like whoever listen to this think they are _soooo cool_ , you know? But it’s boring, just like this house!”

 

“Wait, what is wrong with the house?” Hot Gut looked curious, amused at Sicheng taking jabs at the party music and now even the place.

 

“It’s all gray! Like, I understand the whole minimalism décor thing, but whoever lives here took it to a whole new level, because its super boring! I actually think that the guy must be boring, you know, drinks only fine wine while listening to indie music and reading about economy.” Sicheng broke the eye contact for the first time in what felt like years, already used to stare at what he wanted to believe was the face of his future husband. He looked around for a second, looking for something, finally finding it and discretely pointing at one guy on the other side of the living room, talking with people. “Him, I think its him! He looks like he spends his weekends watching politic documentaries.”

 

Hot Gut followed his eyes, seeing the man and laughing, shaking his head. “That guy is one of the top managers at the company, rich guy, probably lives in a mansion made out of gold.” This time was Hot Gut who was looking around, then pointing at a guy wearing glasses and holding a glass of wine. “What about him? He is drinking wine, fits your description.”

 

Sicheng had to think for a second, before shaking his head. “Nah, he looks like he hides bodies in the attic. Not boring at all.” Thankfully the dark humor didn’t make Hot Gut even flinch, only laugh.

 

 _God_ , hot and laughed at his bad jokes. Sicheng was sold.

 

“I’m imagining your house the opposite of here now, very colorful, maybe a little too much?”

 

“Oh no, it’s not like that! It’s… A normal apartment, I guess? Very messy though.”

 

“I don’t believe you, in my head you now live in an acid trip like decorated apartment. A messy acid trip.” The comment made Sicheng roll his eyes before laughing.

 

“Well, I guess I’m going to have to prove you wrong a next time.” He didn’t care that he was indirectly implying that they would meet again and inviting him to his house, he didn’t regret it, especially when he saw the smile on the others face.

 

“Yeah, maybe next time.”

 

They were back at staring at each other’s eyes and if there was any doubt before, now Sicheng was completely sure he not only he spent the night flirting with the hottest guy in the world, but said guy was also very interested in him.

 

Sicheng was never really one to believe in new year’s traditions. He was the first one to break new year’s resolutions and promises and he didn’t believe in the whole New Year’s Eve midnight kiss. But god, he would kill someone for the chance of kissing Hot Guy at midnight. Maybe if he was lucky enough destiny would hear his prayers and they would end up together. It was plain silly, but he knew he was bound to fuck it up somehow – he always did it – and playing along with the traditions just looked like a good safe plan. After all, people did say that a midnight kiss at New Year’s Eve meant the couple would stay together forever. Right? _Right_.

 

So right now, Sicheng knew he had to play his cards right. He was already doing a good job, Hot Guy was into him, but he had to get the guy to kiss him. Or allow Sicheng to kiss him, both ways worked, he just _needed_ to feel the guy’s lips against his.

 

Had made his decision, Sicheng adjusted himself in the couch, slowly getting a little close to Hot Guy, watching as the other didn’t back off, but fortunately seemed to get a little closer himself.

 

Things were going well, he was ready to make another flirty comment - secure that midnight kiss - when his line of thought was broken by an unfortunate familiar voice. “Good, you are still here! It’s almost midnight, let’s go outside to see the fireworks!” Jaehyun was smiling at him, that very sweet and prince charming smile of his that could melt anyone’s heart, but this time only annoyed Sicheng, who was ready to strangle his best friend. Could he really not tell that he was interrupting something? Sicheng was staring at him now, hoping his friends would get his telepathic message to go away.

 

But before he had the chance to kick Jaehyun back to hell, Doyoung showed up seconds after, holding two glasses of champagne – one probably for his boyfriend, so they could toast at midnight -. “Oh, you met Yuta!” It was the first thing he said as he arrived, making Sicheng furrow his eyebrows in confusing. Who the hell was Yuta?

 

It took Sicheng a solid second to realize Doyoung was looking back and forth from him to Hot Guy, finally making the connection. Hot Guy’s name was Yuta.

 

Sicheng honestly felt like an idiot. Almost an hour talking with the guy and he not even asked his name. Not very smooth.

 

“I hope Sicheng didn’t bother you too much, you already let him crash your party, you didn’t have to keep him company.” Doyoung words made Sicheng slowly sat straight on the sofa. Because wait, what? Crash your party? _Your_ party?

_What_?  

 

“Its ok, I just couldn’t let my guest get bored at _my party_.” Yuta’s word and emphasis on _my party_ was all Sicheng needed for realization to finally sink in and hit him in the face, strongly enough to make him forget how to breath for a few seconds.

 

This was Yuta’s party. Yuta was the owner of this house. He spent the last hour shitting on the guy taste on music, décor and calling him boring. _Shit._

 

Shit shit shit, _fucking shit_.

 

When Sicheng turned around to look at Yuta, the other was already looking at him, a playful smile on his lips.

 

 _Fucking asshole_.

 

Yuta was living for the situation. He made a completely fool out of Sicheng and he knew it. He freaking knew and was enjoying every second of it. He likely wasn’t even laughing at Sicheng’s joke before, he was only laughing at Sicheng, the clueless idiot who couldn’t shut up.

 

Sicheng was embarrassed beyond words, he just wanted a hole to open up in the sofa and swallow him hole, taking him away from this whole embarrassing situation. But there was also a part of him that was very pissed off at Yuta. That asshole spent a whole hour fucking with him, how dare him?!

 

So much for planning to kiss the guy at midnight.

 

If a second ago Sicheng was ready to kick Jaehyun, he now wanted to hug his best friend. Said guy noticed how stiff and nervous looking Sicheng was, pulling him up from the sofa and hooking their arms together. “C’mon, its almost time!” He said quickly, dragging Sicheng to the house backyard, away from Yuta and followed by a very confused Doyoung.

 

As they found a good spot to stand and watch the fireworks, Sicheng was thankfully his friends didn’t ask any questions, picking up that something was wrong and deciding to let the interrogatory for later. He was already embarrassed enough for now, he didn’t need to explain how he was ready to start the new year as the biggest idiot in the world, being played around by an overly hot guy.

 

Maybe it was for the better. Maybe that was a wakeup call, the universe sending him a message: guys are trouble and you are better alone.

 

Because really, the only thing he got from guys that year was trouble. He had crushes on people who didn’t even know he existed, he got into one-sided flings and broke his heart by falling for guys who only wanted casual sex. His year review of his love life was a mess. And maybe the universe had enough of him crying around the corners of his apartment at four in the morning. Meeting Yuta was a wakeup call, what Sicheng just needed to make his decision.

 

People around them started to get ready, champagne glasses in hands, leaving Sicheng as the only one with an awkward cup of orange juice in hands. It was only a few seconds away from midnight now.

 

Sicheng didn’t have much more time to think, he had to decide his new year’s resolutions now.

 

He stared at Yuta – the guy now standing outside as well, the whisky glass exchanged for a now filled champagne glass, waiting for the celebration to start as he chatted with some people -. One look at him and Sicheng was sure of it.

 

This new year he was going to focus on himself. No guys, no distractions. No one was going to make a full out of him again, no humiliation, no heart being broken.

 

And while he was determined to make a better version of himself, why not stop drinking? He was already starting the new year drinking juice anyway, maybe that was another wakeup call from the universe, to be healthier. No fuzzy colorful cocktails that gave him headaches the next morning, just simple and healthy juice.

 

This whole new plan sounded so much better than to kiss a stranger at midnight.

 

The countdown had finally started. 10, 9, 8, 7-

 

Sicheng closed his eyes. _I promise not fall for any guy this year, going to stay single and focus on myself. I also promise to not drink alcohol and try to be healthier._ He said the words inside his mind, silently making his resolutions.

 

6, 5, 4-

 

When he finally opened his eyes, the countdown was almost over, he could hear everyone counting the last numbers as he made eye contact with Yuta. His knees shaking a little bit, but he would never admit it.

 

3, 2, 1.

 

As everyone screamed “Happy New Year!” on top of their lungs, Sicheng watched as Yuta raised the champagne glass in his direction, a smile on his lips.

 

 _Ugh_ , so _annoyingly_ hot.

 

Sicheng broke the eye-contact, turning his whole body around, ignoring the other. He instead raised his cup at Jaehyun and Doyoung, who smiled back and toasted with him, chanting “happy new year” at each other.

 

No drinks and no dicks. New year, new me.

 

Right? _Right_.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was planning on only writing a small oneshot, maybe 500 characters  
> what the hell happened


	2. Judgemental

 

 

On the third day of the year Sicheng almost broke one of his resolutions.

 

Jungwoo was finally back from Europe, a bag full of presents and hours’ worth of stories to tell. He sent a message to Sicheng and Ten – another friend of theirs - minutes after coming back, saying he couldn’t wait to meet and tell all the news.

 

Sicheng knew what hanging out with Jungwoo and Ten meant: a night out at some trendy bar, lots of drinks, gossip, boy’s talk and the night ending with someone passing out and crashing at the others house. It was pretty much their own tradition since they meet many years ago: Ten and Sicheng studied together at university and Jungwoo actually dated Jaehyun; the relationship may have not worked out, but the breakup was amicable and Sicheng was glad to get a friend for life.

 

So, normally, Sicheng would spend the night taking shots of tequila and drinking cute, but also very alcoholic, cocktails – he was even finally free from his antibiotics -, but for the first time ever he wasn’t participating in the drinks rounds. He couldn’t. He promised during that awful New Year’s Eve party that he would give a break on drinking for a whole year.

 

Honestly, three days into the year, he couldn’t help but curse at himself. What the hell was he thinking when he promised that?

 

It took every single cell in his body to control himself and not give-in to temptation as he watched Jungwoo and Ten toast with their beautiful cocktails, while he was stuck with – once again – a glass of boring orange juice.

 

“C’mon, just give up and have a drink with us! A real drink!” Of course, Ten wouldn’t support him and his crazy resolution, Sicheng knew that and understood – he, himself, would think his friends were crazy if he was in their place -.

 

“I can’t! This time I’m keeping my resolutions, it’s for the best, ok? Trust me.” Sicheng said while shaking his head in defeat, maybe trying to convince himself more than the others. Thankfully only the drinking part of the resolution was proving to be a challenge, since he didn’t meet anyone after meeting mister-oh-so-hot-and-annoying Yuta.

 

Thinking about Yuta and the party, Sicheng was fast enough to leave right after the countdown, securing himself an uber pool in record time for a holiday night. Both Jaehyun and Doyoung were surprised with his – almost comical – desperation to leave the party as soon as possible, but didn’t say a word and let him leave with the warning that they would talk about what happened later.

 

A later that never came, thank you very much. Not for the lack of trying though. The couple tried many times to start the conversation and ask about what happened. Phone calls were made and many messages were sent, but Sicheng was quickly enough to avoid the topic, making his way around it until the conversation topic went from “-so you and Yuta” to “Do you think cum can stain an Armani suit?”. As someone with a lack of social skills, Sicheng has long since mastered the art of avoiding topics and conversations; a true professional.

 

But Ten had a sixty sense. He could smell Sicheng’s bullshit, he knew exactly when he was trying to avoid a topic and he made sure that by the end of the conversation he knew every single detail, not letting Sicheng get away from his grip before spilling the truth.

 

And Ten knew something was up the moment Sicheng didn’t go further into explaining why he made such resolution, just trying to cut the subject short with a shameless _trust me_. “Ok, what the hell have you done?” Straight to the point, drink in hands and ready to shake his head in disappointment. That was Ten.

 

“I don’t know what you are talking about.” Sicheng knew it was useless, Ten had already caught him and it was only a matter of seconds until he told the whole story about Yuta.

 

“One year I made a resolution to not eat carbs for a whole year. Lost so much weight I could even fit in my jeans from my junior year in high school.” Jungwoo said sweetly, taking a sip on his cosmopolitan. It was, in all honestly, a weird comment to be made, but anything that came out of Jungwoo’s mouth sounded naturally sweet. He was just too cute for his own good, it was no surprised he could get any guy to fall in love with him. Beautiful face? Check. Even more beautiful personality? Check. Sicheng could only aspire to be half as good as him one day.

 

Ten had turned his attention from Sicheng to Jungwoo for a second, patting his hand in a loving way. “Sweetie, you don’t need to diet, that was crazy! And I’m pretty much sure our _Winwin_ its not drinking because of something other than dieting reasons.” The nickname normally used in a friendlier way, now just made Sicheng want to curl himself into a ball and die. It was such a dumb nickname to being with – Ten started calling him that after winning a series of dancing competitions during university and insisting that it was thanks to Sicheng being there. “ _You get to be my friend and I get to win! It’s a winwin! You are my Winwin!”_ the other said and from then on not only they became friends, but the nickname stuck with Sicheng –, so it was a talent that Ten could get such nickname to sound so mean. Sicheng was sure by now that he really couldn’t bullshit his way out of the conversation this time. “And did you say resolution _S_? As in plural?”

 

 _Shit_.

 

The only chance he may actually had to make his way through the conversation without mentioning Yuta was now gone. He was fucked. “I- hm, may have, hm, two?” Smooth, Sicheng, now Ten definitely knew something was up. Even Jungwoo was staring at him with curiosity.

 

“What is the other resolution, Winwin?” Ten was getting closer to him, leaning against the table in his direction, ready to push him against his chair and make him spill. Jungwoo only watched from his seat, a sweet smile and mouthing a quiet “I’m sorry” for not helping him out.

 

“I may have… You know, just thought it would be interesting if-“ Sicheng gulped down, seeing as Ten was still getting closer, not buying his crap. “Ok! Ok! I promised to not get involved with anyone for a year!” He said it, raising his hands in the air in defeat. Did he feel a little humiliated and did the whole resolution sound dumber out loud than in his head? Yes, but he said it.

 

Both Jungwoo and Ten stared at him as if he was crazy, probably thinking they heard it wrong. Ten was speechless – which was even crazier, he never shut up! -, it was Jungwoo the first one to completely understand what Sicheng had just told them. “Why?”

 

It was a simple question, but did make Sicheng less embarrassed? No.

 

“I’m just tired of getting hurt, of meeting people and never finding someone who truly likes me… I mean, why can’t I have what you guys have?” Was that the whole truth? Not really, he did ignore the whole Yuta situation, but honestly Yuta was only the last straw, the wakeup call he needed to finally step back from dating.

 

His motive made Ten finally come back to his senses, a scowl on his face. “Yah! Winwin! What the hell are you talking about?!” Ten rarely raised his voice at him – at anyone for that matter – so the outburst did catch everyone at the table by surprise. “What we have?! I have a fear of commitment and have been in love with Johnny for the past three years! But I’m too scared to ask about his feelings and also too scared to start a relationship and fuck everything, so I am stuck in a not-a-relationship-but-a-relationship type of shit! Jungwoo on the other hand is a serial monogamist!” He pointed at Jungwoo who only nodded in agreement. “Have you ever seen him single?! He is terrified of it! Jumps from relationship to relationship, without a break! Winwin, we are far from perfect, far from having ideal relationships! You have to stop romanticizing us and our relationships, you know how fucked up we are!”

 

Sicheng felt really embarrassed after getting called out like that. He knew his friends had problems and not perfect relationships. He heard their stories, held their hands when they cried after something bad happened. He was always there for his friends. Yet, he couldn’t stop that little green monster inside his heart from not getting jealous. It was dumb, he knew, but it was beyond his control.

 

“I’m sorry, it was just a spur of the moment thought at the party.” He felt like an idiot, the year had barely started and he was already fucking up like this. Sicheng felt like a loser.

 

His answer and defeated posture made Ten soften up, reaching for his hand and ready to apologize for being too harsh. Sicheng could already hear the beginning of an _I’m sorry_ , when Jungwoo interrupted them. “Wait, is this because of the guy you met at the New Year’s Eve party?”

 

The question was enough to make all the blood disappear from Sicheng’s face as he felt Ten tighten the grip on his hand. “Dong. Sicheng.” He didn’t have the courage to look at Ten in the eyes now, deciding to focus on Jungwoo, scared, but also very confused at how the hell he knew about Yuta.

 

Jungwoo understood the confusion. “I called Jaehyun to wish him and Doyoung a happy new year and he told me you met a guy at the party. He also said you were avoiding the subject. Sorry.” Sicheng wanted to be mad at Jungwoo for giving him away like this - Ten’s grip on his hand was starting to border painful at this point, trying to get Sicheng’s full attention -, but it was impossible when the other looked at him like he was genuine sorry. Too damn sweet.

 

Sicheng knew it was futile to run now, the truth was fully out and he had to start explaining himself. He sighed, finally turning to Ten. “I was really bored at the party ok?” As he started explaining, the grip on his hand disappeared. Ten and Jungwoo stared at him, waiting for him to continue. “Jaehyun and Doyoung disappeared and I couldn’t drink, so I just sat on the sofa and decided to wait until midnight, wish happy new year and go home. I was done with the party! And that was when he showed up…”

 

Sicheng started remembering the events of the party - getting his thoughts in place so he could retell what happened -, and he couldn’t help but let a dreamy sigh when remembering how Yuta looked. The guy may be an asshole, but he was such a hot asshole. The image of the black shirt fitting him just perfectly in all the right places… And god thos- “Winwin, focus!” Fingers were snapped in front of Sicheng’s face, waking up from his daydream. Ten was glaring, while Jungwoo was amusingly smiling at him.

 

“Sorry, hm, so… Yeah, he sat down with me and we started talking. He was…” Once again the images of Yuta showed up on his brain. So fucking hot. “He was really hot. The hottest guy I have ever seen in my life.”

 

That comment was enough for both Jungwoo and Ten to raise their eyebrows in surprise. “How hot are talking about here?” Jungwoo asked.

 

“Like… Hotter than Wonho taking his shit off at the MAMA!” The reaction was immediate, both his friends looking shocked. Jungwoo trying to contain a smile, likely imagining how hot Yuta was. Ten on the other hand was laughing, slapping his arm lightly.

 

“You liar! Nobody can be that hot and you know it!” That made Sicheng laugh as well, getting a little more comfortable, forgetting for a second that he was about to tell his friends how he made a complete fool out of himself in front of this Greek god. “You can continue, what did Mister Hottie do?”

 

“This is the thing…” There it was, the moment of truth. “When we were talking and I’m flirting with him, he flirts back, it’s amazing!” He saw how Jungwoo had a hopeful smile on his lips, oh god, he couldn’t believe he was going to take that smile away in a second. “But I have no idea who he is. So, I’m being myself, you know, my sarcastic self and… I start to talk shit about the house. And the music playing. And about the host that I have no idea who is.”

 

His friends seemed to know where the story was heading, because he heard Ten whisper a “Please don’t say it.”

 

“He was the owner of the house.” He said it. He spilled the truth and Ten groaned, hiding his face in his hands, screaming his name while doing so. Jungwoo was shaking his head in disapproval.

 

Sicheng understood his friend’s reactions. He was just embarrassed at himself now than he was at the party. He was an idiot and Yuta was an asshole.

 

“So, this is it. I spent a whole hour talking and flirting with him, getting my hopes up that a hot guy was into me, when he actually was just having fun watching me embarrass myself!” Sicheng finished the story, grabbing his long-forgotten glass of orange juice and taking a huge sip out of it, instantly regretting the lack of alcohol. He was waiting for his friends to laugh at him, to judge him, but as he finished his drink there was still no response.

 

Both Jungwoo and Ten were now looking at him in confusion. Ten especially seemed very troubled by the end of his story, frowning as he thought deeply about it.

 

It was Jungwoo the first to speak up, confusion evident in his voice. “Winwin, didn’t you say he flirted back?”

 

Sicheng was now the one frowning in confusion. “Well, yeah, maybe, at first I thought he was, but he was just joking with me…” A _right?_ got stuck in his throat. Seeing his friends be confused over the situation started to make him confused as well and he didn’t know why.

 

“But what did he say or do that makes you think he was flirting back?” Ten asked.

 

“He was-” As Sicheng was reviewing everything in his head again - what Yuta said and done that night - he couldn’t help but feel a mix of emotions. On one hand Yuta was 100% his type, it was normal for him to still feel attracted to the other. However, he still couldn’t get over how he was played, even if the images of Yuta smiling at him made his heart beat a little faster. “He was leaning on the sofa like this-“ He tried his best to imitate the other position. “-and kept getting closer to me. He would laugh and smile at everything I said, asking about me and when I tried to be super flirty, talking about a next time, he seemed happy and agreed that there would be a next time?”

 

Once again, his friends stayed in silence, trying to digest all the information they were just given. “I think-“ Judging by his face, Jungwoo was having a hard time coming up with the right words. “From what you are telling us, I think he was interested? Like, genuine interested and flirting with you.” Ten contented himself with just nod in agreement.

 

“He played with me! He could have told me who he was, but he decided to be an asshole!” Sicheng was quickly to answer, his mind working fast trying to come up with comebacks. He didn’t want to be proven wrong, to hear that he made a mistake in judging Yuta too fast.

 

“True. He could have said something and saved you from embarrassing yourself.” Ten words made Sicheng smile proud, he was right, he didn’t make a mistake. “But, you were also an asshole. You were talking shit about him.” And just like that the smile on Sicheng’s face was gone. He wanted to reply that – again – he didn’t know it was Yuta, but Ten was faster. “And it doesn’t matter who the person was, even if it wasn’t him, you are still an asshole for talking shit about someone you don’t know.”

 

“I agree with Ten, Winwin. I always tell you that you have to tone down a little bit on the sarcasm sometimes, especially when flirting.” By then Sicheng was pouting. Why were his friends against him? Why did they have to defend Yuta? That was not how he imagined this conversation to go.

 

“Actually, in my opinion that was the biggest proof he was interested!” Ten words caught both Jungwoo and Sicheng by surprise, all the attention on the table now on him. “He could get mad at Winwin, could been rude, really humiliate you. But he stayed with you, talking and flirting! He didn’t care you are a huge asshole-“ Sicheng couldn’t help but mutter a _wow thank you_ , followed by a laugh and a _you are welcome_ from Ten, who continued right after“-He was still interested. I think you made a mistake, Winwin.”

 

And there it was. The words Sicheng didn’t want to hear, the ones he feared the most.

 

He made a mistake.

 

A part of him was already starting to think he shouldn’t have acted the way he did it, he should have played cool, laughed at the revelation of Yuta being the host. Who knows? Yuta would tease him about it, they would joke around the subject for the rest of the night, flirting, and when everyone left Sicheng would still be there and they would have sex in that same couch.

 

The _what ifs_ were starting to eat Sicheng alive. He fucked up. He had a chance with an attractive guy and he blew it.

 

Jungwoo and Ten noticed how Sicheng’s expression fell by the second. He was blaming himself and they knew it. Jungwoo reached for Sicheng’s hand, Ten doing the same. “Don’t think too much about it, Winwin, there are many other great guys out there. The year barely started, you will find someone.” They smiled at Sicheng, trying to reassure him it would be alright.

 

Sicheng tried his best to smile back and pretend that yeah, it was ok. But he knew it wasn’t. He was too judgmental, too quick to think the worst out of Yuta and this where it lead him.

 

Maybe he was right in promising to not get involved with anyone that year. But for a whole different reason: he clearly wasn’t ready to be with someone else. How the hell was he supposed to be in a relationship if he was going to be like this? Maybe it was for the best to just stay alone and try to become a better person.

 

His friends tried to change the subject, talking about Jungwoo’s new boyfriend and the amazing trip to Europe. Sicheng tried his best to participate, even if his mind still took him back to the most beautiful smile he would never see again.  
   
 

✦ ✦ ✦

   
  
After three long hours at the bar and many cocktails later – or in Sicheng’s case many glasses of juice -, he was finally back home. He entered the apartment, dropping his keys on the furniture beside the door and taking his sneakers off, leaving at the entrance in a mess of his and Renjun’s shoes.

 

The first thing he noticed as he entered the apartment was that his baby brother was home. The lights were on and he could hear the sound of the television.

 

Sicheng stepped into the living room, finding Renjun spread on the sofa, watching a new episode of My Strange Addiction while texting his friends at the same time. “This woman eats rocks.” It was the first thing his brother said, eyes still on the phone screen.

 

Sicheng only hummed, sitting on the corner of the sofa, the only space not being occupied by Renjun’s body. “I thought you were going to a party today? It’s Saturday.” Since entering college it was hard to see Renjun home on a weekend night, he was always going out with his friends and enjoying the most out of the whole college experience.

 

“We were going to Jaemin’s house, but he had to go visit his grandparents.” Once again Sicheng only hummed, his eyes trailing to the television, watching as the woman on the screen put a bunch of rocks in her mouth, munching it. His expression changed to one in disgust. It was a disgusting scene, yet, he couldn’t take his eyes away, it was his guilty pleasure.

 

He and Renjun loved this type of program. They used to spend whole weekends watching it, but things changed slightly when Renjun started to go out more and stay outside during his free time from college. Sicheng on the other hand still spent most of his time on the sofa, remote control in hands, searching for the weirdest show he could find.

 

He just liked judging people’s lives.

 

And that thought made him remember the whole conversation that took place at the bar. The revelation of him maybe being a judgmental asshole, even If his friends didn’t really say it with all the words in his face.

 

Sicheng turned his attention to Renjun, his eyes still on the phone. “Renjun.” The other didn’t look up, but the older knew he was listening. “Do you think I’m too judgmental?”

 

That simple question was all it took for Renjun to finally look at his brother for the first time that night, a dead-pan expression, judgment all over his face, as if Sicheng had asked if the sky was blue, if water was wet. And Sicheng felt very much judged. “Ok, forget I asked! Dumb question!” And just like that Renjun’s eyes were back on his phone.

 

His baby brother was right and Sicheng knew it. He spent his whole time inside the uber back home thinking about it. He judged everyone at the New Year’s Eve party, he even judged the house and the music.

 

And worse: he judged Yuta. Twice. One when he didn’t know he was the owner and called him boring, another when he thought he was playing with him.

 

Sicheng wasn’t only a judgmental asshole, he was an idiot. And he was very much aware of it now.

 

The sound of his own cellphone beeping inside his pants pocket took him away from his thoughts. Sicheng sighed, taking the phone out and unlocking the screen, ready to see a bunch of photos of Jungwoo’s trip – he promised during the bar talk to get the photos on Lucas’ phone to show them -, but what he found was a single message from an unknown number.

 

 **_Unknown number_  
** _Hey!_

 

It was short, simple and Sicheng had no idea who sent that. He didn’t know the number and no one beside his friends texted him, so he was very confused.

 

The answer to his question came a second later in a new message. The content making Sicheng threw his phone at the sofa, a gasp coming out of his lips and once again Renjun was looking at him, curious at what had just happened. Sicheng could feel his brother’s eyes going from him to the cellphone, so he quickly snatched the phone back, before Renjun had the chance to take it, read the message and start questioning him about it.

 

Renjun glared at him, but Sicheng didn’t care, his full attention now back on his own phone. Because right there, on his screen, was the reason for his small freak out.

 

 **_Unknown number_  
** _It’s Yuta_

 

Sicheng didn’t really know how to react, what to say. Was this for real? Or did his mind – or his friends – decided to play games with him and making him believe Yuta was sending him messages?

 

How the hell he even got his number to begin with?

 

He didn’t have much time to think about it, the beeping from his phone once again interrupting his train of thoughts.

 

 **_Unknown number_  
** _You know I can see you are reading my messages, right?_

 

Shit. _Fucking shit_.

 

Sicheng closed the messages app, trying to wrap his head around what the hell was going on. First, Yuta got his number. Second, he was now messaging him.

 

Ok, the first question was how he got his number. And – thankfully - it wasn’t hard to know how, there was only one person they both knew in common.

 

His fingers worked fast, opening his contacts list and finding the person he was looking for, calling him. Sicheng put his phone close to his ear, waiting for the other to answer. He could feel Renjun’s eyes on him from time to time, still curious. Sicheng was already starting to feel nervous enough without his baby brother staring at him, dissecting him in hopes of finding out what the hell was going on. So, he got up from the sofa, going straight to his room and closing the door, ready to freak out away from the younger’s eyes.

 

It took a while, but finally the other person on the lined picked the call. “Well well, look who is calling.” Sicheng deserved that treatment. He spent the past days ignoring Doyoung and Jaehyun the best way he could, only answering when they came to talk to him, but never starting conversations – too afraid of the Yuta subject being touched on -. So, it was no surprise that Doyoung was acting like this now.

 

“I’m sorry.” It was better to just say it, go straight to the point, no excuses. Sicheng’s answer seemed to please Doyoung.

 

“You are forgiven. So, tell me, what has finally made you call me?” Doyoung asked.

 

“Did you give my number to Yuta?”

 

The question got Doyoung by surprised, he stopped for a second before asking again. “Was I not supposed to?”

 

“What?” Sicheng was confused. “Why did you give it?”

 

Doyoung was just as confused as Sicheng now, not really understanding where his friend was going with his questions. “Jaehyun told me there was a lot of sexual tension between you two when he went to call you-“ Great, so Jaehyun did notice and was just being an asshole by interrupting them. Great. “And I also heard from a few co-workers that nobody had the courage to go talk with Yuta when he was with you.” Great again, everyone at the party was able to see that Yuta was into him.

 

“Oh.” That was the only thing Sicheng’s brain could come up with.

 

“So when he asked me your number at the part-“

 

“Wait, he asked my number during the party?!” Sicheng interrupted Doyoung middle sentence.

 

“Hm? Yeah. Right after you left he came talk to me, asking where you were and you should have seen his face when I said you left already. He looked so disappointed.” Sicheng had a hard time imagining that, Yuta exiled confidence when with him, not the type to be sad because Sicheng left. But in the end, he didn’t really know the other and he had no reasons to not believe Doyoung. “So, he asked me for your number and I gave to him.”

 

Now Sicheng knew why and how Yuta got his number. The only question on his mind now was why it took the other three full days to message him. He got his number back in the party, but today was the first time he ever messaged him. “Hm, thanks for explaining. I kind of have to go now.” Sicheng could hear Doyoung grumble on the other side of the line.

 

“I can’t believe you are not even going to explain yourself!” Doyoung sounded offended, rightly so.

 

“I swear I will explain everything to you and Jaehyun! But right now I need to fix my mess!” His words didn’t pass unnoticed by Doyoung.

 

“Wait, are you talking to him now?”

 

“No, but I will after I turn off this call.” Sicheng bit his lips, He really was doing this.

 

“Oh! Then just promise you will, without fail, call me or Jaehyun later and explain everything! And if you don’t, Dong Sicheng, you can bet your ass I’m calling Yuta and he will be the one explaining.” Sicheng didn’t really see that one coming, but he guessed he deserved after leaving his friends in the dark for so long.

 

“Don’t need to threat! I will, ok? I promise!” He could hear Doyoung muffling a _you better_ , before saying goodbye and turning off the phone.

 

Sicheng stayed in the same position, cellphone against his ear, for a few seconds, trying to gather up the courage to look at his screen again. While talking to Doyoung he started to think that it wasn’t a big deal, it was just Yuta, a guy he met, a guy with whom he had already talked before. Sounded easy enough to just answer a simple message from him.

 

But god was it not.

 

The reality of Yuta not only being interested in him, but also looking after him at the party and asking for his phone was something that never, ever in a million years, crossed Sicheng’s mind. Until thirty minutes ago he was beating himself up mentally for fucking things up with the other.

 

He wasn’t mentally prepared for this surprisingly change of events.

 

Yuta hadn’t send any new messages since the last one. Understandable, since Sicheng never answered him, leaving him on the cold and lonely _Read_ status.

 

It took all the courage inside Sicheng to finally look at his phone, unlocking the screen and opening the message app once again, staring at Yuta’s messages. This was it, no turning back.

 

Sicheng’s fingers pressed the buttons on the keyboard, typing a reply.

 

 **_Sicheng_  
** _Hi!_

 

Oh god, he felt so dumb. He was freaking out over sending such a short and impersonal message. He was an adult for god’s sake, a full grown-up unable to send a reply bigger than two letters.

 

Thankfully his short reply didn’t seem to budge Yuta, who quickly replied back.

 

 **_Unknown number_    
** _Was starting to think you were going to ignore me._

 

Sicheng snorted, it only took him – he looked at the time in his screen – 17 minutes to reply! He would never ghost the other. Again.

 

He was taking so long thinking about what could be a good reply, that he failed to notice the little speech bubble on the side of the chat – indicating Yuta was writing again – until he heard the notification beep for a new message.

 

 **_Unknown number_  
** _Can I call you?_

 

The message made Sicheng jump in surprise, cellphone almost slipping out of his hands. Oh shit. _Shiiiiit_. Yuta wanted to call him. Why? How? When? _Why?_ Was Sicheng mentally ready to talk to the other like that? Probably not, he wasn’t even ready for the text messages. But would he ever be ready? The answer was likely no as well.

 

He knew there wasn’t much time, he already left the other waiting way too long. He also knew that if he thought too much about it he may never say yes.

 

 **_Sicheng_  
** _Sure!_

 

Sicheng sent the message and almost immediately the screen changed to the incoming call screen, making Sicheng jump once again. _Shit_ , Yuta meant call _right at that moment_. He passed a hand in his hair in reflex, trying to make himself look nice – even if the other couldn’t see him -, taking a deep breath before pushing the green button, accepting the call.

 

“Hello.” _God._ It had been three days, but Yuta still had the same effect on him, his legs turning into jelly the moment he heard the others voice. Sicheng had to sit down on the bed, making sure he wouldn’t end up on the floor by the end of the phone call.

 

“Hi!” Sicheng thought to himself if Yuta could notice how nervous he was by his voice, because he was shaking, holding his breath right after a simple hi.

 

Yuta laughed on the other side of the line and Sicheng smiled unconsciously, he still remembered how good the other looked when laughing, his smile was out of this world. “Don’t be nervous.” Oh, so _he did notice_ , was the first thing to cross Sicheng’s mind. It was amazing how Yuta was so good at reading him, even over the phone.

 

“I’m not.” He lied, making the other laugh again.

 

“Of course you are not.” Sicheng could imagine the other smiling, playful. “So, how are you?”

 

It was a simple question, but still made Sicheng bite his lips, thinking about it. _Well, I spent the last three days since we saw each other hating you, but also hating myself for how much I’m attracted to you and my friends kinda made me realize I’m an idiot for not kissing you._ Yeah, he was not saying the truth. “I’m ok. What about you?”

 

“I’m also ok, could be better though.” Yuta’s answer made Sicheng a little worried, was he ok?

 

“Did something happen?” Sicheng asked, even if he couldn’t do much, he would still listen to the other if he wanted to talk about it.

 

“Something did happen.” Yuta’s answer made Sicheng sat straight on the bed, ready to hear the other out. “I met the most beautiful guy ever a few nights ago at a party, but I’m not sure he is interested.”

 

Sicheng blinked a few times. Was Yuta talking about him? Him? Dong Sicheng? Dong Sicheng the most beautiful guy ever? _Really?_

 

He decided to play a little safe, just to be sure, Sicheng had enough already of making a fool out of himself in front of Yuta. “What makes you think he is not interested?”

 

“You see, at first I thought he was interested. We hit off really well, talked a lot, but he later ignored me and ran away.” Unless Yuta was very unlucky and had a thing for assholes, there was no way he wasn’t talking about Sicheng.

 

“I think-“ Sicheng mind was doing a full marathon, trying his best to think of anything that didn’t include him admitting the truth. Not yet, at least. “I think it’s probably just a misunderstanding.”

 

“A misunderstanding?” Yuta sounded amused, clearly not expecting that answer.

 

“Yes. I think he is interested.” Sicheng bit his lips, crossing his fingers and hoping for the best.

 

“And do you think he would accept going out for dinner with me?” It took all the self-control inside Sicheng for him not to scream. The world hottest man was asking him out!

 

“I heard he is free next Friday night.” The truth is, Sicheng was free every night, but something inside of him was screaming that it was better to be free the next day after the date, a gut feeling that he wouldn’t come back home after the date. Or at least he hoped so.

 

“Good to know. How does seven sounds?” Sicheng started thinking about his schedule. He would be out of work at five, but it took him around thirty minutes to get home. He wanted to take a shower and pick a good outfit, making himself look good. It would take a while for him to get ready, and he didn’t know where they would go, so if it was far from his house he may have even less time.

 

“Eight?” He asked uncertain, hoping it wasn’t too late and the other had no problems with.

 

“Eight it is then.” Yuta accepted and Sicheng could tell – or at least imagine – that the other was smiling. “I can’t wait to see you again, Sicheng.”

 

The confession made Sicheng stop. The words getting stuck in his throat, any chances of a reply flying over the window. Yuta said so casually, like it wasn’t a huge confession, as if he didn’t just turn Sicheng into a whole mess, ripped his heart from his chest and stole it. Not only that, but it was the first time the other ever called him by his name and God - oh god! - it sounded so good! Sicheng was glad he was already sitting out, because he would be on the floor by now, face glued to his room purple rug.  

 

However, as much as hearing the confession made Sicheng happy, he didn’t know how to answer. Should he admit that he was also very eager to see Yuta again? Should he play cool and lie, pretend he didn’t really care even if every cell on his body was arching to meet the other? Or maybe just ignore it and pretend Yuta never said anything?

 

Maybe he was talking too long, overthinking every option, because he once again was blessed with Yuta’s laugh. “I will send you the address of the restaurant later, ok?”

 

Sicheng was such a mess he could barely answer to that, his brain turning mushy while trying to come up with words. “Y-yeah, sure.” His voice barely came out, but it was loud enough for the other to hear him and laugh again, he likely noticed the effect his words had on Sicheng.

 

“See you on Friday, Sicheng.” Hearing Yuta say his name may have become Sicheng’s favorite thing ever, making him smile like an idiot.

 

“Yeah, see you.” The phone call was ended, but Sicheng stayed still for a few seconds, his brain processing what had just happened.

 

Yuta not only called him, but asked him out, admitting he really wanted to see him.

 

It was a miracle. A New Year’s miracle!

 

As reality sank in, Sicheng could no longer hold back the scream that had been stuck on his throat for the past minutes. Jumping from his bed into the middle of the room, jumping around and doing a victory dance like a complete idiot.

 

Sicheng could hear the sound of his room door getting slight open, enough for Renjun’s head to stick inside. His baby brother clearly curious at what that scream was, but his curious expression quickly changing into a judging one, watching as Sicheng danced around the room while hugging his phone. But it was ok, because nothing could kill Sicheng’s happiness now, not even his judgmental brother.

 

“Yah! Go to your room!” He stopped dancing for a second, just to order Renjun to leave. His brother glaring at him for the second time that day, closing the door as he left.

 

And just as Renjun left, Sicheng was back at celebrating, falling on the bed and rolling around a few times. He felt excited over the idea of seeing Yuta again, even if it would take almost a whole week for it. A whole week to get prepared, to plan every single detail and make sure the date was perfect, that he would look and sound perfect – because God knows he didn’t want for the whole party fiasco to happen again. He needed to be ready for everything, every scenario, any questions. No more making a fool out of himself -.

 

Sicheng was so happy with the successful turn of events, that he had long forgotten his New Year’s resolution. The thoughts of it on the back of his mind, completely clouded by Yuta’s perfect smile.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not really happy with this chapter, idk, something feels a little off...  
> I updated the tags, this fic is very romantic comedy inspired, so it felt right to add the tag, also it's not as funny as i wished, so I'm sticking with the attempted humor tag


	3. Perfect

 

 

The day after the phone call with Yuta, Sicheng woke up with a message from him, the restaurant address and a “Can’t wait ;)” written by the end – wink face and all -.

 

They didn’t really talk much after that, but for the rest of the week Sicheng spend his days thinking about the date or staring at the few messages they exchanged, remembering himself that it was indeed real, not a hopeful dream of his. He was going on a date with Yuta and he had never been this nervous for a date in his life.

 

It was also during that same week that Sicheng had finally found time to meet Jaehyun and Doyoung – a small dinner after work at their house -, and explain himself. Jaehyun laughed through the whole story, finding the whole mess hilarious. On the other hand, Doyoung got mad for a second, scolding Sicheng for being so careless. “What if it was my boss? What if it was a really high-up manager? I could have lost my job because you pissed off someone important!” He was right, Sicheng didn’t really think through how his comments could have affected Doyoung at a party with his co-workers, it was irresponsible of him.

 

Thankfully Jaehyun was there to calm his boyfriend down, reminding him that it wasn’t a powerful manager - just Yuta - and Sicheng did the exactly opposite of pissing someone off; he charmed the man. That seemed to calm Doyoung down, who asked what was Sicheng plan now.

 

In all honestly, Sicheng didn’t have a plan. He was going to have dinner with the man, maybe go back to his house or to some cheap hotel, have sex, and the rest was a blur. It could be just a one-time thing, another one-night stand to add to his list. Or could it be the beginning of something great, the first date leading to many others, an engagement after a few years, a happy marriage with three kids and uncle Renjun living in the guest room.

 

Not that Sicheng had thought that far, of course not.

 

However, as much as Sicheng thought about all the good possibilities, he couldn’t help but be scared and expect the worse. He had already fucked up once with Yuta and it was a miracle the other was still interested, giving him a second chance. Doyoung sensed his nervousness and helped him, giving out every single information he had about Yuta – it wasn’t much, but every little bit was appreciated -, making Sicheng a little more prepared for his date.

 

Nakamoto Yuta, twenty-eight years old. Worked at the same sector as Doyoung in the company, but had a higher position and even his own office. Doyoung believed that give it a couple of years and Yuta would be a top manager, since he was very responsible and a jack of all trades, could do everything. The man was also very charming – but that Sicheng knew himself -, there was no one in the company who didn’t like him, from the higher-ups to the woman in the cafeteria, everyone was charmed by Yuta’s smile and easy-going personality. Doyoung didn’t know anything about the other’s personal life – they weren’t friends, just friendly co-workers -, but he once heard from some ladies at the office that Yuta was single and was a very sought-after bachelor at the company.   

 

Sicheng thanked Doyoung for all the help – god knows he needed all the help he could get -, doing his best on memorizing everything.

 

But even with help, he still wasn’t confident. Friday came faster than expected and he could barely focus on work that day. His mind never left his room, thinking about his wardrobe and how he had yet to choose something to wear. Sicheng had a whole week to plan things out, yet, he failed to do so and now struggled to make himself look presentable in time for the date.

 

The train ride back home was done in record time, passing like a blur, like it took a second for him to be back home and inside his room. Sicheng had already taken his shower, using all the expensive bath products he once bought thinking that someday there would be a special occasion to use it. A date with Yuta was more than just that special occasion.

 

So now there he was, standing in front of a pile of discarded clothes, nothing felt right or good enough.

 

Earlier that same day he googled the restaurant that Yuta made reservations for: it was a cute Italian restaurant, a little on the expensive side, but nothing that demanded for a suit. Dressing something casual, chic but still casual, was the best route to go.

 

Sicheng felt like he went through every single item in his wardrobe, checked every shirt, jacket, pants. He wanted something that would make Yuta think he was someone to be taken serious, that he wasn’t just someone he could play with for one night and never call again. At the same time, he also wanted something that could get him laid by the end of the night. A perfect mix of _I want to be loved and I don’t mind having sex on the first date_ kind of outfit.

 

Maybe some tight pants? Maybe that cute pastel blue shirt that Jungwoo gave to him last year for his birthday? Sicheng wasn’t a fashion expert, he had no idea what was the damn perfect mix.

 

He groaned, sitting on the floor and going through the pile of clothes there, trying to see if he missed something. He was starting to run out of time and there had to be at least one item in that pile that could work.

 

“What are you doing?” Renjun’s voice made Sicheng stop in his tracks, turning away from the pile, finding the younger standing by his door, a confused look on his face. Sicheng would also be very confused if he found his older brother – not that he had one – in his underwear, diving on a pile of clothes on the floor.

 

“I have nothing to wear.” He answered simply, going back to his mission to find a good outfit.

 

Renjun didn’t say anything, just entering the room in silence and checking the clothes still inside the wardrobe. “Where are you going?”

 

“This really cute restaurant at some trendy neighborhood. Have to be there at eight.” Sicheng said while smelling a yellow shirt, unsure if it was clean. Renjun hummed, reaching for a pink tailored jacket at the back of the wardrobe.

 

“What about this?” Renjun showed the piece to Sicheng, who looked up to see what had his brother found. “When you wore it last Easter, all my friends thought you looked cute on the photos.”

 

Sicheng kept staring at the jacket. Yes, he indeed looked cute when wearing it, really cute. But the question was: would Yuta want to have sex with a really cute Sicheng? And how could Sicheng explain what type of outfit he wanted without telling his baby brother that he hoped to get laid? Definitely not a conversation he was looking forward to have with Renjun.

 

In the end, Sicheng had no other options, accepting the younger’s idea and taking the jacket from his hand. So much for planning the perfect outfit. He settled down for a simple white button shirt and jeans – and the pink tailored jacket on top of it -. It was simple, but just like expected it made him look very cute.

 

“Maybe you could wear a beret too.” Renjun commented. Sicheng was staring at himself in the mirror, checking for any problems, details, anything that could screw him later in the day. As he heard his baby brother, his expression morphed into one of disgust, that would be _way_ too cute. “Or maybe not.” Renjun laughed. “Are you coming back home?” A simple question, but Sicheng could hear the hiding meaning behind it. He turned around to look at his brother who had grin stamped on his face. The little devil caught him in the act.

 

“Not sure.” Safe answer, no details, no information. Renjun didn’t seem content with the answer, ready to ask something else in hopes of embarrassing him, but Sicheng was faster. “What about you?” Renjun had told him a few days ago that he was going out on Friday.

 

“I will! And I wanted to ask if it’s ok for Mark to sleep here? Cheaper to share a taxi with him than take an uber by myself.”  Mark was one of Renjun’s friends from college, a good kid, never caused problems and was always very polite when meeting Sicheng. As far as he knew, there was no problem letting the boy sleep at their house.

 

“Just try to not make a mess, ok?” Sicheng loved his brother, but no love in the world would make him clean Renjun’s vomit out of the carpet again, much less Renjun’s friends’. “Don’t forget: call me if you n-“

 

“If I need anything or if something happens.” Renjun cut him middle phrase, rolling his eyes and crossing his arms. “I know, I know, you can stop nagging.”

 

This time it was Sicheng who rolled his eyes, preferring to ignore the other’s brattiness - Renjun may be out of his teenagers’ years, but he was still a brat sometimes -.

 

Sicheng checked himself in the mirror one last time. There was no time left to change his outfit, that was it. He was ready. He picked his wallet from inside his work bag, then his cellphone, placing it inside his pants pocket. “Don’t forget to lock the door when you leave ok? I’m going to take my keys with me.” Sicheng gave some final considerations. “Try not to drink too much.”

 

“Aren’t you late for your date?” Renjun tried to change the subject.

 

He wasn’t late, he was perfectly on time. “Be careful, if you vomit do it on the bathroom!”

 

“Just go!” The younger grumbled, making Sicheng laugh, leaving before Renjun tried to kick him – literally – out of the room and the apartment.  
  
 

✦ ✦ ✦  
  
  

When Sicheng arrived to the restaurant, he was told by the reception lady that Yuta was already waiting for him at their table. She guided him through a maze of tables, taking him to a more seclude side of the restaurant at the very back. The place was cuter than the photos on the internet, but there was also a romantic aura in the place thanks to the dim lights and lighted candles adorning every table. 

 

The woman finally stopped in front of a table, his table. And right there, a Greek god was sitting.

 

Sicheng didn’t know what to expect when it came to how Yuta was going to look. He knew the other was hot, his face and body were permanent printed on his mind, however the Yuta sitting in front of him was a whole new level of hotness. The man was wearing a suit – a suit for god’s sake! -, his hair was slighted pushed back, a few strands falling on his face. And oh god that face! Perhaps Sicheng did end up forgetting how handsome the man was, because he looked even better tonight.

 

Maybe it was lighting.

 

Or maybe it was the smile he had directed at Sicheng, a smile already so beautiful on its own, but now the brightest, as if Sicheng was the best thing that ever happened in his life.

 

And that smile made Sicheng’s inside bubble in happiness, he himself not holding himself back from smiling as well. For a second it was like it was just the two of them in there, lost in their own world as they stared at each other and smiled.

 

Sicheng dared to think that he never felt like that in his whole life. No one, no past boyfriend, no ex fling, ever got him with just a simple smile. Yuta made him feel things in an intensity he never imagined it was possible.

 

Their moment was unfortunately cut short, as the reception lady talked to Sicheng, directing him to his chair, waiting for him to sit down and then proceeding on giving a quick explanation on the restaurant cuisine. Sicheng nodded to her, biting his lips as he waited patiently for her to finish and – finally – leave. It was only after she was gone from the table that he turned his attention to Yuta.

 

Yuta was looking at him, he probably never stopped since the moment Sicheng showed up. The million-dollar smile was still present on his face and it made Sicheng’s heart miss a few beats. How could a man look so good?

 

Before Sicheng had the chance to say anything, a hello, a nice to see you, crack a joke, anything; Yuta beat him to it. “You look more beautiful than I remembered, ethereal.” His words caught Sicheng completely by surprise. His expression likely gave him away, because Yuta was soon laughing. “What? You don’t believe it?”

 

It wasn’t that Sicheng didn’t believe. He knew he was good looking, attractive, but most of the time he was just called cute by everyone around him, even when called beautiful it was never in the way and with the same intensity that Yuta said. “People normally call me cute.” His voice came out a little low, unsure.

 

Yuta was once again smiling at him, nodding his head. “You really are cute.” Sicheng knew that comment was coming, it was only a matter of time. He was cute and the pink jacket only added points to the cuteness. “But you are so much more than just that. You are breathtaking, Sicheng.” Now, for that comment Sicheng wasn’t prepared.

 

For someone who said Sicheng was breathtaking, Yuta wasn’t much different. Was it with his handsome face or his words, the man seemed to know exactly what to do or say to take Sicheng’s breath away, to make his heart beat so fast he thought it would explode.

 

They had been sitting together for less than a minute, but Sicheng could already tell that every misconception he had about the other was wrong. Yuta was perfect and he was the luckiest man in the world for charming such a man. “I- thank you, I guess?” He wanted to say something more elaborate, compliment the other as well, but as Sicheng’s brain had turn to mush, he found impossible to be cohesive without sounding like an idiot.

 

“You guess?” Yuta was amused, the playful smile which haunted Sicheng’s dream was now adorning his lips. “The words of a _boring_ man are not enough to fancy you?” The emphasis on the word boring got Sicheng to arch his eyebrows.

 

Oh no, he didn’t. He fucking didn’t.

 

But there Yuta was - the same expression as the one in the party when he made fun of Sicheng for not knowing who he was -, once again playing with him. This time, however, Sicheng wasn’t mad.

 

Two could play this game.

 

“What can I say, I’m a very hard man to _please_.” Sicheng’s tone was bordering flirty and his words held two meanings, none of which went unnoticed by Yuta.

 

“Good thing I have the _whole night_ to do it.” Just like Sicheng, Yuta too gave an ambiguous answer, clearly having fun with their game.

 

The whole situation made Sicheng feel at ease. He was extremely nervous before the date, scared he would fuck things up with Yuta again. But as the other joked around with the whole party fiasco, Sicheng couldn’t help but think he never fucked anything up. Yuta wasn’t mad at his words, just like he wasn’t mad at Sicheng for ignoring him and leaving without explanations.  As far as he could conclude from the flirting, the man was just as charmed by him now, as he was at the party.

 

His only mistake was taking too long to realize that. If Sicheng wasn’t such a dumb asshole, they would definitely have flirted until the end of the party, no hard feelings about the misunderstanding, just a lot of sexual tension. They had lost a precious amount of time – ten days into the new year already – and Sicheng was willing to make it up for the lost time.

 

And thankfully it didn’t seem like Sicheng was the only one thinking this way.

 

Yuta grabbed the forgotten menu at the table, opening at the drinks page. “This restaurant imports a really good wine from a small Italian village, should we order a bottle?”

 

In any normal circumstances, Sicheng answer would be a yes. And he was ready to accept, when a little detail came running through his mind, hitting him like a punch in the stomach.

 

His damn New Year’s resolutions.

 

“Shit!” The word escaped Sicheng’s mouth before he was fast enough to stop it, but he didn’t care, his mind was already working around his biggest problem at the moment. How could he forget the resolutions?!

 

“What?” His reaction clearly got Yuta by surprise though, as the other now stared at him in confusion, not understanding why proposing wine would get Sicheng to curse.

 

“I can’t-” Think fast Sicheng, think fast. “I-I can’t drink.” Failed.

 

For a few seconds Yuta didn’t say a word, until his expression changed from one of confusion to understatement. “Oh right, the antibiotics!” 

 

It took Sicheng’s brain more than just a few seconds to understand what the other meant with antibiotics, finally remembering that yes, the antibiotics! He was, for real, taking antibiotics when they met and Sicheng wasn’t able to drink at the time because of it.

 

So Sicheng’s mind came up with a few options.

 

Number one: he could say fuck it to his resolutions and have a drink with Yuta, he was already breaking one resolution so why not break two?

 

Number two: Sicheng liked to think that he wasn’t actually breaking his love related resolution. After all, he never specified the rules. By _get involved_ did he meant being someone’s else boyfriend? Did one-night stands count? Did a single date already break his resolution? There were no rules, so what if he never broke his resolution by accepting and coming to his date? This meant he could break the alcohol resolution and still keep the other. Keep things balanced.

 

And the final option, number three: he was – _maybe!_ \- breaking his dating resolution and the universe would undoubtedly curse him for breaking two resolutions on the same day. Better be sure and not regret later. No drinks.

 

“Yes, still can’t drink.” Sicheng may have decided to keep his drinking resolution, but that didn’t mean he had to tell Yuta about the truth. At least for now.

 

“Good thing for us, the restaurant also serves an amazing grape juice from the same village, what do you think?” Yuta was back at smiling, making Sicheng feel a little bad for lying. But just a little bit, not enough to admit the truth.

 

“You can drink if you want!” It wasn’t because he was suffering that he had to put the other through the same.

 

Yuta shook his head. “It’s ok, I don’t mind. The juice will go well with almost the whole menu, I don’t think we will lose anything from not drinking any alcohol tonight.”

 

“Do you come here often?” From the way Yuta talked it felt like he regularly went there, already familiarized with the menu.

 

“Not really, only came twice. First time with a couple of friends and the second by myself. A mistake though.” His lasts words were accompanied by a shrug.

 

“A mistake?” Sicheng couldn’t help but ask.

 

“I don’t know if you noticed, but this place it’s not very single person friendly.” Yuta pointed out. “The atmosphere is romantic; the clients are mostly couples. Coming here by myself wasn’t a good idea.”

 

“You didn’t strike me as the type who would be bother by that. Too confident.” From the moment they met until now, Yuta exhaled confidence in a way that it was amazingly sexy in Sicheng’s eyes. To hear that a few couples made him regret coming to a restaurant was more than just surprising, it didn’t make sense.      

 

“I think it has more to do with feeling like a fish out of water? It didn’t stop me from coming, but I could have gone to somewhere better.” Yuta explained himself and Sicheng nodded along.

 

“Well, good thing McDonalds is everyone friendly! Even at four am, never felt any less welcomed!” Sicheng joked.

 

“For our second date then I will take you to McDonalds.” The implication of a second date made Sicheng smile. However, they had a game going on and he wasn’t one to accept defeat.

 

“McDonalds for a second date? At least buy me Pizza Hut before!”

 

“Pizza Hut? I think you mean Domino’s.” Yuta’s expression changed into a serious one. Not long after, Sicheng had the same expression.

 

“Domino’s? I think you are making another mistake here.”

 

“And I think you are crazy, Pizza Hut tastes like cardboard.” Yuta said, making Sicheng gasp, a hand on his chest.

 

“I reject myself to stay with someone with such offensive opinions!” Sicheng was getting ready to stand up, ready to leave the table.

 

“You won’t even fight for us? Is this how our marriage ends?” Yuta retorted, indignant.

 

“I will take the kids, you can keep the _boring_ house.” And with those last words, both Sicheng and Yuta were unable to keep the act, bursting into laughter – and it was so loud some of the tables around them turned to give a mean look and even “shh!” them -. Sicheng was laughing so hard his stomach hurt, he could barely sit still on the chair, hugging his stomach and curling his back until his forehead touched the edge of the table, trying his best to stop laughing. Yuta was no better, there were tears on the corner of his eyes and he did his best to wipe it.

 

For a few minutes they kept like that, controlling their laughter and catching their breath. They knew they probably looked crazy at the moment, but they were having so much fun it was hard to care.

 

Yuta was the first one to pull himself together, picking the forgotten menu laying on the table. “So… Grape juice?” He smiled at Sicheng, who smiled back.

 

“Sounds perfect.”  
  


✦ ✦ ✦  
  
 

From all the first dates Sicheng ever had in his life – and there were many -, he could say with confidence that the one with Yuta was the best one in his life.

 

They spent the whole night talking about everything and nothing, from personal details of each other’s life to small talk about the food. They joked and made fun of each other, laughing right after. And, mostly important, they flirted. For the whole night, almost every comment was followed by a flirty remark.

 

The date was perfect. Yuta was perfect. The man was straight out of every dream Sicheng ever had, all his fantasies and wishes in the form of one man. And, it looked like the feeling was mutual: Yuta stared at him with such adoration, complimenting him from time to time. Sicheng never felt more desired.

 

So, it was no surprise that Sicheng had decided that he would, without a doubt, go to Yuta’s place after the date. There was nothing he wanted more at the moment then to get to know the other in a more intimate level, he needed it, desire rushing through every single cell on his body.

 

Dinner was over and they were now walking down the road from the restaurant, to where Yuta’s car was parked. There were no words needed to be exchanged, there was a silent mutual agreement: they left the restaurant, Yuta pointed out his car was parked a few minutes’ walk away and Sicheng nodded, following the other.

 

The walk to the car was surrounded by a comfortable silence, both were smiling and Sicheng didn’t hold back the small giggles every time he and Yuta’s hand would brush off against each other, especially since Yuta started to brush their hands on purpose, just to get a reaction out of Sicheng. He felt like a dumb teenage in love, reacting to the smallest things ever.

 

When they finally stopped in front of a car, Yuta was fast in wrapping his arms around Sicheng waist, pulling him closer until their bodies were pressed together. All their sexual tension culminating for that one moment, when their bodies finally touched.

 

“So.” Yuta started, grinning.

 

“So?” Sicheng asked, the eye-contact between them was becoming too much and it was hard for him to concentrate with such a hot man so close to him.

 

“Was this _boring man_ able to fancy you?” From all the things that Sicheng expected Yuta to say, that wasn’t one of it. He laughed, but quickly tried to compose himself again, be a little more serious.

 

“I’m not sure yet…“ Sicheng’s hands went up to Yuta’s shirt collar, distracting himself as he played with the tie, adjusting it before using to pull the other a little closer. “But you have the _whole night_ to do it, right?” Sicheng liked their little game, but he needed Yuta to understand that he was ready for something more, no more games, just them.

 

Yuta smirked at Sicheng’s answer and actions, his face getting closer to Sicheng’s by the second. “The whole night, the whole day… Whatever time it takes.”

 

Sicheng could feel the other’s breathing, their lips already ghosting above each other, millimeters away. The hands on the tie slowly went to the back of Yuta’s neck, ready to pull him closer and touch his lips.

 

This is, until the first notes of NCT Dream’s We Go Up blasted through the night, coming from Sicheng’s phone in his pants’ back pocket. The whole atmosphere was gone as Yuta tried his best to control his laughter, watching as Sicheng closed his eyes and counted to ten, clearly trying to control his anger. He was going to kill Renjun.

 

Renjun.

 

Renjun was calling him.

 

The realization made Sicheng open his eyes, immediately pushing Yuta away, enough for him to be able to get his cellphone.

 

Renjun never called him. Every time he went out, Sicheng would go on and on with the same “call me if anything happens, if you need me”, but his brother never did it. He was going to a party, he was supposed to be having fun, not calling Sicheng in the middle of it. The phone call meant something must have happened, something big enough for him to call Sicheng.

 

Just the slight thought of something happening to Renjun made Sicheng’s heart stop, fear taking over him as he accepted the call. “Renjun?!” He called for his brother, but the other side of the line was very noisy and Sicheng couldn’t understand anything from the other side of the line. “Renjun?” He tried calling for him again, this time a voice answered back, but it wasn’t Renjun’s.

 

“Ah, its Mark!” The fact that it wasn’t even Renjun that it was calling him, made Sicheng a hundred times more scared. For a second he even forgot Yuta was there with him, that they were about to kiss. He only remembered Yuta’s presence because the man held his hand free hand, squeezing, in a silent gesture of support and concern.

 

“Mark? Where is Renjun?! Why are you calling me?!” As he waited for Mark to answer – he started talking with someone else and Sicheng hoped, prayed, it was Renjun -, he noticed that wherever the boys were didn’t sound like a party. There was a lot of voices, but no music playing, it wasn’t a party. Sicheng could even swear he heard a baby crying in the background.

 

“Renjun is- He is your brother, stop it!” Sicheng breathed in relief, ok, Renjun was alive and with Mark, but he was still at the edge, if Renjun could speak, why did Mark call him? What was going on? “Hm, he is- I mean, we are at the hospital.”

 

Sicheng’s heart missed a few beats and thank god Yuta was there to hold him, his arm still wrapped around Sicheng’s waist, preventing him to end up on the floor. “What do you mean hospital?! What happened?! Is Renjun ok?! Mark talk to me!” His voice was getting higher at every word, almost screaming by the end of his phrase.

 

“I- He- He is ok!” Mark’s stuttering didn’t make Sicheng feel more at ease. “But he broke his arm.” The end was almost whispered, fear evident on the boy’s voice.

 

“He WHAT?!” Sicheng fully screamed at the phone, Yuta’s grip on his body still firm, the other staying with him. “What hospital are you guys in?” He waited for Mark to answer, giving him the name of the hospital. “I’m coming right now! You both stay there and wait for me!”

 

The phone call was over and Sicheng quickly opened the uber app on his phone, ready to tap the address, when Yuta caught his attention for a second. “What hospital is it?” Sicheng didn’t look up from the screen, answering the other as he wrote down the information needed. “Ok, I know where it is. Let’s go.” Yuta let go of Sicheng’s body, hand diving into his pants pocket and picking the car’s key, pressing the button and disabling the alarm.

 

His actions got Sicheng by surprised, stopping in the middle of his uber form. “What?” He asked as the other pulled him towards the passenger door of the car, opening and pushing him inside.

 

“I’m taking you there.” Yuta said casually, closing the door and making his way around the car to the driver’s side. Sicheng wanted to protest, but he wanted to get to the hospital as fast as possible and an uber would take time to come, Yuta was his best option. “Just open the map app, I want to make sure we can take the fastest way possible there, ok?” Yuta said as he entered the car, getting himself ready to go.

 

Sicheng nodded, opening the map on his cellphone. He wanted to thank Yuta for helping him, but his body was still consumed by fear, not able to think properly, his whole focus on Renjun.

 

At some moment on the way, Yuta rested his hand on Sicheng’s tight, circling the area with his thumb in a gentle touch. It wasn’t sexual in any way, it felt comforting, as if Yuta was telling him everything would be ok and Sicheng left himself melt under the weight of the man’s hand on him, calming him a little bit as they drove to the hospital.

 

Thankfully it wasn’t a long ride and as Yuta stopped the car in front of the hospital entrance, Sicheng was promptly opening the door, ready to leave. “I’m sorry for tonight, thank you for bringing me!” That was definitely the worst way possible to say good-bye and end their date, but Sicheng couldn’t care less at the moment. Renjun’s welfare was more important. Later he would have all the time in the world to regret his poor ass decision on how he treated Yuta. Now, he just needed to get inside that hospital and see with his own eyes that his brother was alive and well.

 

Almost running all the way from the car to the hospital’s doors, Sicheng could feel his heart on his throat, looking around the lobby, looking for Mark and Renjun. There wasn’t a lot of people there – it was eleven pm on a Friday after all -, just a few elders with their families and a mom holding her baby. Not so far away in a corner of the lobby, his eyes finally landed on two boys sitting with their backs facing Sicheng. Even if he couldn’t see their faces, Sicheng was still able to recognize Renjun.

 

He marched towards them, he wanted to scream at Renjun, hit him for making him worried sick, but it was a hospital and unless he wanted the three of them to get kicked out, he knew he had to keep it cool. Until they left, of course. “Dong Renjun!” Sicheng called his name when he was close enough.

 

Hearing his name made the boy slowly turn his head around, coming face to face with a very pissed of Sicheng. Renjun didn’t say anything, just kept his head low, while Mark bowed to Sicheng from his chair, also avoiding eye-contact.

 

Sicheng stared at Renjun’s arm, now enclosed in a cast. He sighed, closing his eyes and massaging his temples. He was too young for all the stress Renjun put him through sometimes. “Have you already payed the bill?” He opened his eyes and watched as both boys nodded. At least they did that. “Ok, let’s go home.” Sicheng turned around and started walking, both boys standing up and following him, without saying a word. This time Sicheng didn’t bother opening the uber app, he saw a taxi stand close to the hospital entrance when he got in and it would be easier to just hop inside one.

 

If Renjun had any hopes that Sicheng wouldn’t comment or nag him about his arm, it was promptly crushed as soon as they stepped outside the hospital, Sicheng hitting him on his good arm the moment the door closed behind them. “Dong Renjun!” The boy let his head hang down, waiting for the scolding. “What the hell happened?! And why did Mark call me and not you?! You are in perfectly shape to make a phone call!”

 

“It was no big deal, he didn’t need to call you.” Renjun’s answer made Sicheng even more mad, hitting him one more time.

 

“What do you mean it was no big deal? You broke your fucking arm, Renjun!

 

“You weren’t even going to notice.” Renjun grumbled under his breath.

 

“Are you fucking kidding me, Renjun? How the hell was I not going to notice it? Please explain to me how you were going to keep this away from me? How were you going to hide it?” Sicheng was even madder at his brother reaction and words, than at him for breaking his arm. He couldn’t believe Renjun was going to act like this. He didn’t care that poor Mark was standing beside them, having to listen to everything, heck! He couldn’t even care that they were in front of a hospital; he was going to make Renjun wish he was never born with the scolding of the year. “You were so irresponsible tonight! I let you go out, have fun, expecting you to call me if something happens and you go around and do this?! How am I supposed to trust you when-“ Sicheng noticed his brother attention went somewhere else, looking behind him. “Pay attention to me, Renjun, I’m talking to you! I can’t trust you if you are going to hide stuff like these from me-“ Renjun said his name, trying to get his attention. “Don’t interrupt me! If you hide things from me how do I know you are ok? That-“ Once again he was interrupted. “I swear to god, Dong Renj-“ This time the younger didn’t let him finish, forcibly turning his body around.

 

Sicheng was ready to kill Renjun for trying to shut him off like that, but he caught sight of what Renjun was trying to get his attention to. Right there, a few steps away from them, was Yuta.

 

Yuta was still there, he never left. Yuta was waiting for him.

 

Air left Sicheng’s lungs, leaving him breathless for a good second, staring at Yuta.

 

Scolding Renjun could wait – they lived together, Sicheng had the rest of their lifes to scold him for tonight -, for now Sicheng had to talk to the man, walking to Yuta. He wanted to ask why the other was still there, why hadn’t he left already. In the back of his mind he knew the answer, but it felt to surreal to be true.

 

“Is he ok?” Yuta was the first one to speak between the two, doing a little head gesture towards Renjun.

 

“Yeah, just a broken arm… But I’m still going to kill him later.” Sicheng couldn’t help but say it, making Yuta smile. “What are you still doing here?”

 

The smile didn’t disappear from Yuta’s face despite with how direct – and maybe even a little, unconsciously, rude – Sicheng was. “I’m taking you guys home.” It wasn’t a question, but a statement.

 

Sicheng wasn’t dumb, he had the vague idea of why Yuta was waiting for him, but to hear the words come out of Yuta’s mouth made his heart flip a few times in his chest. “You have already done so much… I- We can’t.” In all honesty, there was nothing Sicheng wanted more than just accept, it would make things so much easier. However, he already felt like he was taking advantage of the other’s good will, and he knew how tense and on the edge he was right now, not exactly a side of him Sicheng wanted to show to Yuta so soon.

 

“I want to take you home.” There was a gentleness in Yuta’s voice that made Sicheng feel secured, unable to vocally reply or disagree, staying quiet. “Let’s call the boys and go home, ok?” The ever so gentle tone got through Sicheng, who finally nodded. He turned around – facing Renjun and Mark who observed them in silence, waiting -, and with a simple head gesture towards Yuta, both boys started waking in their direction. When they were close enough Yuta smiled at them, not letting the slight awkward meeting get the best out of him.

 

Renjun was looking from Sicheng to Yuta, back and forth, waiting for something, to be presented to his brother’s date perhaps, unsure if Sicheng was going to do it. The truth is, Sicheng didn’t have a great dating history; most of the guys he dated were shit heads who didn’t stick around for too long and sometimes he didn’t even date them - only getting the short end of the stick with a one-sided love and a friends with benefits relationship -. So Sicheng never presented anyone to Renjun, he didn’t even dare to talk about the guys he was going out with because he didn’t want to drag his baby brother to his messy private life, to meet people who wouldn’t stay.

 

It wasn’t until Renjun and Yuta were standing face to face that Sicheng noticed the situation he was now in. He met Yuta a little bit over a week ago, they just had their first date and Sicheng didn’t know exactly what was their status. Would they have a second date? Were they going to just fuck? Was Yuta ever going to call him again after? Sicheng didn’t know the answer, so as the reality of being forced to introduce his brother to Yuta sank in, he couldn’t help but feel nervous.

 

“This is-“ Sicheng knew his voice was sounding to low and weak, showing how uneasy he was. He took a deep breath before starting again. “This is Yuta, he is taking us home.” He gestured with his hands at Yuta, his brother and Mark doing a little bow. “These are Renjun, my brother, and Mark, his friend.” He now gestured at the youngers, being Yuta’s turn to do a little bow. Sicheng decided it was for the best to keep it simple, don’t go into details about his relationship with Yuta – even if he knew that Renjun was aware the other was his brother’s date -.

 

With introductions done, Yuta guided them towards his car parked at the hospital parking lot. Sicheng had a sense of déjà vu, his mind filling in with memories from earlier when he and Yuta were walking to the car after dinner, the kiss they almost shared before Mark called. Sicheng wondered if he would get a second – or was it already his third? – chance at dating Yuta. So far all his attempts to win the man over ended up disastrously, Sicheng wasn’t feeling very confident with the possibility of second date, much less a relationship.

 

Thankfully, as awkward as introducing Renjun to Yuta was, the drive back home was done in a bearable silence. It was already late and, having come from a party, both Renjun and Mark were visibly tired, dozing off on the back seat of the car. Yuta kept his distance from Sicheng, focusing solely on the street while driving, not touching the other in any way and Sicheng both hated it and thanked the other for it. He hated because he missed the weight of the man’s hand on his tight like before, it was comforting, good, a reminder that Yuta was by his side in more than just the literal sense. And right then he very much wanted to be reminded – or in this case assured – that Yuta was still _there_ with him. On the other hand, Sicheng felt thankful for the lack of touch, not knowing how he would feel if Renjun woke up and saw them being intimate in any way.

 

For the whole way back home, Sicheng tried his best to not fall asleep, he couldn’t risk dozing off and completely fucking things up with Yuta. It was already bad enough that the man was having to drive him around, but to fall asleep would be even worse, it would be offensive to say the least. So Sicheng kept pinching himself in the hand, moving around on his seat every time he started to feel too relaxed, his eyes getting too heavy. He may have blacked out for a few seconds a couple of times, but to stay awake was such a hard task. He hated himself and by the end of the ride he was sure Yuta would hate him as well.

 

He had his eyes closed for a quick second, maybe a minute – Sicheng really hoped so – when they arrived at his house, a hand shaking him slight on his shoulder, making him startled open his eyes and search for whoever had woke him up. The sight of Yuta’s smile was enough to bring Sicheng back to reality, the sad reality that maybe it wasn’t just for a second or a minute that he had his eyes closed. “We are here already.” The gentle tone never left Yuta’s voice, calming Sicheng’s heart on the slightest.

 

Sicheng opened his mouth, ready to say something, when Renjun’s voice cut him short, echoing inside the car. “Sorry for the inconvenience and thank you for the ride. Good night.” Mark repeated Renjun’s words, bowing right after, both boys left the car promptly after thanking Yuta, leaving him and Sicheng alone inside the car. Sicheng turned to the window, watching the youngers walk to the building’s entrance, not looking back.

 

Truth is, Sichen was hoping he could thank Yuta with them and leave together. He felt so embarrassed with how the night was ending, he was the biggest loser ever. The date was great, perfect, and now he was stuck inside the car with the hottest man alive and all he wanted to do was run away. Pathetic.

 

“Sicheng-“ “I’m so sorry!” Both said at the same time, Sicheng freezing instantly and Yuta laughing, being the first one to speak up again. “You have nothing to be sorry about.” He tried to reassure Sicheng, who was quick in shake his head.

 

“I do! You didn’t have to take me to the hospital, to bring us home and, for god’s sake, I couldn’t even stay awake! It’s so late already and you must be tired! I’m so so so sorry!“ Sicheng apologized, head hanging low in shame, even too embarrassed to even look at the other in the eye, stare hanging on the car’s floor.

 

He felt a hand on his chin, a tender touch, and soon his head was lifted, eyes meeting Yuta’s. There was a warmth in the way other looked at him, making Sicheng’s heart fill with a fuzzy feeling, it felt good. “Sicheng, I wanted to take you to the hospital. I waited for you there because I wanted to take you home, make sure you and your brother were ok.” Sicheng wasn’t sure such a perfect man could exist. Unfortunately, the other’s hand left his face and he instantly missed his touch. “As for the sleeping, I know you were tired, I didn’t take personally… Unless you tell me you fell asleep because of how _boring_ I am.” And just like that, with one dumb joke, Sicheng was laughing again, a smile back on his lips. Yuta seemed content with it.

 

“It was a mix of both.” Sicheng joked back, Yuta smiled playful at his response. “But I’m still sorry for everything.” 

 

“Well,” Yuta started. “If you are so sorry you could make it up to me with a second date.” By the time Yuta finished talking, Sicheng was starting at him in complete shook. He must have saved China in his past life to be this lucky.

 

“I’m free tomorrow night.” He didn’t try to hold back the words, not caring if sounded too desperate or needy, if it was too soon. He just wanted to go out with Yuta again.

 

“Good. Is eight o’ clock ok for you?” Sicheng’s heart was about to burst out of his chest, he was one lucky bastard. He nodded. “Then I will pick you up at eight, and I’m not asking!” Yuta didn’t even give Sicheng the chance to protest, but it didn’t matter, because Sicheng was so happy he would have accepted anything, he would even agree and go to a date on the city sewers if Yuta proposed.

 

Sicheng didn’t want to leave, but they had a long night and both were tired, the least he could do was let Yuta go home. So, he reluctantly unbuckled his seat bell, sighing, eyes locking with Yuta’s one last time. Hand already on the car door’s handle. “See you tomorrow then.”

 

“See you.” He knew he had to leave, he was ready to do it so. Yet, something inside of him stopped his movements, his hand gripping the handle, but never opening the door. Yuta looked puzzled at him, not understanding why he stopped out of nowhere.

 

He was an idiot. He knew that. Two times he had his chance with Yuta, letting it slide and spending way too much time hating himself for not doing things differently, thanking his luck every time the other stayed and continued to show interest. This time however, he decided to make sure Yuta knew how interested he was, that he wasn’t giving up on him. Sicheng gathered all the courage inside his body, took a deep breath and let go of the handle, his hands finding it ways to Yuta’s nape, pulling him closer at the same moment his own body bended towards the other. It was fast, maybe a little clumsy, but soon enough their lips were touching in a simple light peck, but it was enough to leave a tingling sensation on Sicheng’s lips, wishing for more.

 

And more he got it. Yuta immediately bringing their lips together again, hand now resting on the back of Sicheng’s head, to keep him in place as he deepened the kiss.

 

On the back of his mind, Sicheng could hear a small voice screaming about his New Year’s resolution and how the universe would punish him for breaking it. But with Yuta’s lips glued to his, Sicheng found he couldn’t care less.

 

Yuta was worth it.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow if i thought the last chapter was bad, this one is a mess haha on the brighter side is almost new year and i can't wait for the NCT cafe and pop-up store thats gonna happen, even if everything is expensive and the drinks look weird heh  
> happy new year! Don't make dumb resolutions guys!


	4. Chapter 4

 

Sicheng wasn’t sure what to expect of his second date with Yuta.

 

They spent the whole morning and early afternoon texting, but Yuta never told him where they were going, just said he should wear something casual and comfortable, to not worry too much about his clothes. Sicheng didn’t know if he said it because they were going to a very casual place or because he would lose his clothes by the end of the night.

 

He liked to think it was both.

 

So this time Sicheng didn’t spend hours worrying over what to wear; just going for his trustworthy casual combo composed by jeans and a slight oversized knitted sweater that gave him sweater paws. He still looked cute – which by default meant he looked good -, but it was warm, comfortable and hopefully perfect for whatever Yuta had planned for them.

 

As much as he didn’t know anything about their date, Sicheng was just as excited for it as he was the day before for their first date.

 

After the whole mess of picking Renjun and Mark at the hospital, Sicheng was sure Yuta wouldn’t want anything else to do with him - only helping him out because he was a good guy. But he was happily wrong about it, getting himself a second date and a good-bye kiss.  

 

One hell of a kiss if Sicheng had to describe it.

 

At first Sicheng just went for a peck, something small, but that hopefully would show he was interested and liked Yuta. He wasn’t planning for an almost make out session inside the car. When Yuta pulled him over for a deeper kiss, Sicheng wasn’t going be the one to deny – he wanted just as much as the other -, opening his mouth and letting himself be kissed for real. He had no idea how much time they spent kissing, but he knew that it was for a long time because it was already midnight when he finally got inside his apartment. His lips were very red and puffy – a strong give away of what he was doing minutes before - and Sicheng was never gladder that Renjun and Mark had already locked themselves in Renjun’s room, not awake to witness the mess that Yuta made out of him.

 

In all honestly, the only thing Sicheng was expecting for the second date was to be kissed again. Many times, hopefully.

 

Yuta had just texted him, saying he would arrive in a few minutes; so now there Sicheng was, standing in front of the mirror, checking himself out one last time before leaving. Thankfully, because of all the past events he wasn’t nervous. His brain finally fully computed the fact that Yuta seemed to like him just as much as he liked the other, he wasn’t going anywhere. Everything would be ok.

 

Sicheng adjusted the black beret on top of his messy blond hair – he decided that maybe way too cute wasn’t _so_ bad, Yuta thought he was ethereal after all -, giving one last look at the mirror before leaving his room. Fully charged cellphone on one pocket, wallet on the other, keys in hands. He was ready to leave the house when he heard Renjun’s voice coming from behind him.

 

“You are going out with him again?” Sicheng already had his hand on the door handle, but he fully turned around to look at his brother. Renjun was in his pajamas – he stayed inside the whole day, not bothering to change clothes -, the sleeve was folded on his broken arm to accommodate the cast, a forever reminder of his dumb mistake. He awkwardly stood on the corridor, looking a little nervous.

 

“Yeah, he is picking me up in a few minutes.” Sicheng gestured towards the door, indicating he was leaving for the date. “I’m taking my keys, so lock the door, ok?”

 

Renjun nodded, staying quiet for a few seconds, trying to come up with the right words. “I’m… I’m sorry for interrupting your date yesterday.”

 

Sicheng shook his head, smiling at his brother’s word. He was a dumb kid, but he was his dumb kid. “You are more important than any date, you know that.” When the whole mess started, for a second Sicheng was – indeed - mad at Renjun for calling right before his first kiss with Yuta, but it was only for that one second. The moment he found out what happened, the whole trip to the hospital and the way back home, all that time the idea of being angry on his brother because of the date never crossed his mind. He was mad at Renjun for not calling him, for breaking his trust, but never because of Yuta.

 

“I know, but…” It was clear that he and Renjun had different thoughts on the subject, so Sicheng gave him time to think, even if his cellphone started beeping inside his pocket. “He- He seems like a nice guy.”

 

To hear those words made the smile on Sicheng’s face only grow bigger, warmer. Even if Yuta and Renjun first meeting was anything but conventional, to know that his brother approved the man meant the world to Sicheng. He nodded, agreeing. “He is, he really is.” Hearing those words Renjun finally smiled back, visibly relaxing. The younger was probably beating himself up for messing up Sicheng’s date and making him lose the guy, even if he never dared to admit. “Be careful tonight, ok?”

 

“And if anything happens I will call you.” There was no sarcasm, no eye roll, just pure sincerity in Renjun’s words and Sicheng couldn’t help but get closer, his hand going straight to his brother’s hair, playfully messing it up. “Hey!”

 

“If you decide to break your other arm, do it early, I’m gonna be _busy_ tonight.” Sicheng said wiggling his eyebrows and it took a second for Renjun’s face to lose any sight of nervousness, his expression completely changing into one of disgust as he understood what Sicheng meant.

 

“Ew!” He pushed Sicheng away, making the other laugh and run back at the door. “Just get the hell out of here, ew!”

 

Sicheng was happy to see that Renjun was finally back to normal, his bratty college boy normal. “Love you too, baby!” He sent the younger a kiss before opening the door and finally leaving the house. He could still hear his brother’s grunts of disgust from the other side of the door, laughing once again while walking to the elevator. Everything was really going to be ok.

 

Another beep sound came from his pants’ pocket, reminding Sicheng that he had a date. A date that was picking him up.

 

“Shit!” The words came out of his mouth, quickly picking his phone on the pants’ pocket, unlocking it and reading the new messages on the screen.

 

 **_Yuta_ ** _  
I’m here!_

**_Yuta_ ** _  
Sicheng?_

 

“Shit!” He said it again. The first message came ten minutes ago, while the second had just arrived. Yuta came to pick him up and he made him wait, not even answering the messages.

 

Sicheng cursed under his breath as the elevator slowly stopped on his floor, pressing the first-floor button as soon as he stepped inside. It’s ok, everything was fine, he kept repeating in his head like a mantra, taking one big breath and calming himself down. No need to get nervous, it’s ok to get late sometimes, everything was ok, perfectly fine. _Ok? Ok._

 

Even after repeating those words a hundred times to himself, the moment the elevator doors opened, Sicheng sprinted out of it and towards the exit of the building, getting outside in record time.

 

He had no problems looking for Yuta’s car, because parked on the same spot as the night before, right in front of his house, there it was. However, this time Yuta was waiting for him outside, leaning against the passenger door, arms crossed and checking his phone.

 

Sicheng didn’t know if elegantly hot was a thing, but it should be, because that was the best way to describe the other at that moment. Yuta looked like he came straight away from an Armani photo campaign, with his grey turtleneck and well fitted black pants and jacket. So much elegancy, and so hot, even doing the most basic thing as waiting. His clothes did, unfortunately, made Sicheng feel a little underdressed with his sweater paws and cute beret.

 

As if sensing his presence, Yuta looked up from his phone and saw Sicheng, his posture completely changing; he uncrossed his arms and smiled brightly. He walked towards Sicheng, getting face to face with him and not wasting any time, sliding his arm around Sicheng’s waist, pulling him closer enough so he could kiss him.

 

It was unexpected, but very welcomed.

 

The kiss didn’t last long, but Yuta made sure his body was still firmly pressed against Sicheng’s even after they broke the kiss apart.

 

“Hello to you too, I guess.” Sicheng said, smiling as Yuta stole another quick kiss from him.

 

“Was starting to think you weren’t coming.” As much as Yuta was smiling, he also sounded sincere and it made Sicheng shook his head, a little skeptical that such perfect man could have doubts like that. It wasn’t the first time that Sicheng got a glimpse of this side of Yuta and it made him very intrigued, more and more curious to know everything about the man.

 

“If you are going to kiss me like that every time I’m late, next time I’m not going to show up until thirty minutes later.” Yuta laughed, giving him another peck on the lips.

 

“Then next time I’m going to wait inside the car.” One last peck on the lips and Yuta stepped back, separating them, only to hold Sicheng’s hand and pull him to the car, even going as far as opening the door for him.

 

Already settled down on the passenger seat, Sicheng waited until Yuta walked around the car and entered the car from the drive’s side, before speaking up again. “But really, sorry for being late. I got a little distracted talking with my brother.”

 

“It’s ok, don’t worry. How is he though?” Yuta asked as he started the car engine, eyes now focused on the street.

 

“He is ok.” Sicheng had talked with Renjun that morning, confronting him about what happened and giving him the scolding of his life. “That dumb kid really thought he could ride a hoverboard on a hill after a couple of beers, not only he fell but he broke the thing in half.” The revelation of how Renjun broke his arm made Yuta burst into laughter. “Don’t’ laugh! It’s an embarrassment to our family!” Sicheng tried to play serious, but he too couldn’t hold back his laughter.

 

“If it makes you less embarrassed of him; in my college days I once woke up on the roof of my frat house wearing nothing but chicken printed underwear. It was summer and I got burned from head to toes, the strongest tan ever, so for the longest time everyone in my fraternity called me roasted chicken.”

 

Sicheng didn’t know what to feel, what to say. He stared at Yuta completely incredulous, not sure if he believed the story. First, it was a ridiculous story. Second, there was no way that someone so put together and perfect could have done that. “What?!” Those were the only words that Sicheng was able to come up with as the reality that not one Yuta had done that, but he was once a frat boy. Yuta - the man Sicheng described as elegantly hot - was a former frat boy.

 

Unbelievable.

 

“We all make mistakes in college.” Yuta said while laughing, his eyes adverting to Sicheng for a second, seeing his surprised expression.

 

“Oh hell no! There is no _we_ here! The only mistake I did when I got drunk in college was texting my exes!” Sicheng stated, making Yuta laugh louder. “And I can’t believe you were a frat boy!”

 

“Why? The question was a sincere one, curiosity dripping from it.

 

“You are just… You are perfect.” The words slipped from Sicheng’s mouth. He felt a little embarrassed to admit out loud how he saw the other, but there was no other way to describe him after all.

 

Yuta only shook his head. “I’m far from perfect. I’m boring.” Normally those words would sound like teasing. Their on-going game of bringing back Sicheng’s mistake at the party. But Yuta sounded serious, like he truly believed he was boring. And that caught Sicheng off-guard.

 

“You are not boring. No boring guy would wake up in the roof of a fraternity.” Once again Yuta only shook his head.

 

“That was a long time ago, I changed too much since then.” Sicheng agreed with him. It was really hard to believe that the man in front of him was once a crazy college boy. Sicheng knew that people changed, its normal, natural, he himself wasn’t the same person he was during his college days. He matured, became an adult. But with Yuta the change was so drastic that it was weird to imagine it happened naturally.

 

“Why did you change?” A part of Sicheng was scared he may be touching a sensitive subject, but the smile on Yuta’s face reassured him it was ok.

 

“After I graduated from college I got a job at this really important company, a very serious and strict place with many rules. It was really hard, you know? Every day I would get scolded, told by my superiors that I was irresponsible, useless, messy… They weren’t wrong though; I was a recent graduate boy who had no idea what I was doing and didn’t know how to play the adult’s game. I didn’t even know how to tie a tie!” Yuta softly laughed, but Sicheng could hear a hint of bitterness in it. “In the three years I worked there I tried my best to adapt myself, to change in order to become the model worker they wanted me to be. The way I spoke, walked, dressed… Even my music taste changed. At first, I was scared I may be losing myself, who I was, but slowly I found myself liking all my new interests and this new and more mature version of me. It was a 180 degrees change, but I don’t regret it.”

 

Sicheng heard Yuta’s story in silence. It was truly amazing what the other had been through, everything he did in order to become who he was not. Truth is, Sicheng couldn’t imagine himself doing the same. From choosing his degree in university to auditioning to studios he felt matched his style, he never felt the need to change to fit it, to be accepted. Sicheng – in a way – took the easy road by picking something he loved and made it work around him, while Yuta was the opposite, making himself work around what he wanted. And that made the man look even more amazing in Sicheng’s eyes. Yuta was hard-working, passionate and ambitious. No wonder Doyoung said it was a matter of time until Yuta gets a manager position; his whole adult life was built in order to succeed, he was ready for it. Despite Sicheng founding a little sad that Yuta had to let go of who he was, the man was in piece with his choices, he embraced it.

 

“My statement stays the same, you are perfect.” This time Sicheng wasn’t embarrassed to say it out loud, feeling like it would be good to give Yuta some type of validation. He felt like he understood the man a little bit better. It made sense to him now why Yuta said he didn’t like going to the restaurant by himself and feeling like he didn’t fit in. Or why he had those briefly moments of insecurity. He was still human, even if Sicheng kept on believing he was perfect.

 

Yuta chuckled. “Well, I think you are perfect. Especially wearing a beret.” Sicheng smiled, making a mental note to wear berets more often.

 

The car started to slow down as they entered a more residential area of the town, catching Sicheng’s attention as he soon looked outside the window. He familiar streets got him by surprise, he recognized where they were. “Are we…?” He asked, realizing where their date was going to be.

 

“Yeah.” Sicheng raised his eyebrows, turning his head around to stare at the other again, intrigued by what he had planned for the night. “I’m not expecting anything, ok? I just really like home dates. I thought we could order something and just relax, talk… Maybe listen to some boring music.”

 

Sicheng chuckled. Truth be told, Sicheng really liked Yuta’s idea. He was someone who enjoyed staying at home normally, so a home date already sounded fantastic. He also trusted Yuta; he knew that if he didn’t want to go further than kisses the man wouldn’t pressure him. “I hope we are not going to order from Domino’s.” He joked back, watching as Yuta smiled playfully.

 

“I wasn’t, but now that you said…” That earned Yuta a light slap on his arm.

 

“And to think I told my brother I wouldn’t come back home tonight…” Sicheng said in a sad fake tone, knowing fully well what his words implied.

 

“Do you prefer the pan crust or the thin crust at Pizza Hut?” Yuta’s reply got him a loud laugh from Sicheng and another slap on the arm.  
  


✦ ✦ ✦  
  
 

After much discussion, they settled on ordering chicken. It was easy to eat, delicious and they both could agree on it.

 

They had already finished eating, the delivery boxes forgotten on the dining table as they changed seats to the sofa, taking only their drinks with them – two glasses of orange juice; Sicheng kept telling Yuta it was ok for him to drink, but the other insisted on not drinking any alcohol in his presence.

 

The whole scenario was very reminiscent of when they first met. The memories flowing through Sicheng’s mind. How at first sight he was attracted to Yuta, the chemistry they had and how everything went downhill so fast. He was glad everything worked out so well in the end, but he couldn’t help but still have a few questions around what happened.

 

“Can I ask you something?” Yuta seemed a little caught off guard, but nodded nonetheless. “Doyoung told me he gave you my number at the new year’s party, but you only texted me days later. Why?”

 

Yuta adjusted himself in the couch, leaning on his side against the couch back, sitting with his body turned to Sicheng’s. “After Doyoung told me you went home, I asked for your number. I wanted to get to know you better, ask you out. Because he gave to me without questions, so I assumed you liked me-“ Oh boy, _if only he knew_ , Sicheng thought. “-but I also assumed there was something wrong. I felt like you gave me a cold shoulder before leaving without saying a word… Thus I decided that maybe it would be good to wait a few days before talking to you, give you time and space.”

 

It was the best answer Sicheng could ever wish for. He didn’t expect Yuta’s reasons to be so genuine, so considerate. This perfect man was thinking about him, how he felt and how to make him comfortable since the beginning. It was almost hilarious that on the opposite side, Sicheng was cursing him until his fifth generation.

 

“My turn now. Why did you leave?” And there it was. Sicheng knew the question would come up sooner than later, it was meant to happen. Yet, he was still very embarrassed to admit it out load to Yuta.

 

Sicheng put his juice glass on the coffee table, picking a cushion on the sofa, providing something to hide his face in it after finishing the story. “So… You know how I kind of called you boring during the whole night without knowing?” Yuta nodded. “I was- Wait, before I continue, why didn’t you say anything?” Maybe there was a tiny chance, very tiny, that the other was – indeed – having fun with him and Sicheng wasn’t one hundred percent wrong at the time.

 

“Oh, at first I thought you knew who I was since it was my party. I found it funny how you were shitting on my music taste and my house’s decor, but then I noticed you actually had no idea that I was the boring guy you were talking about. I wasn’t bothered by and I just decided to play along. I didn’t think it was important.” The only thing Sicheng confirmed was that he truly was an asshole. And an idiot. “Now you can continue.”

 

Sicheng took a deep breath, knowing fully well he was going to make a full out of himself in that damn sofa once again. “Ok. The truth is I actually thought you were making fun of me. You thought I was an idiot and decided to watch me embarrass myself, a total misunderstanding. So, of course, I got mad at you and left the party as soon as I could. The end.” A very condensate version of the story, but the truth nonetheless. Sicheng was staring at the cushion on his lap, no courage to look up at Yuta as he felt his cheeks burning hot.

 

He heard the sound of Yuta placing his glass on the table beside his. And soon his face was being lifted by gentle fingers on his chin. Yuta had come closer, staring at him with the same smile that made Sicheng weak on the knees when they first met. “I was having fun, but not out of you, with you. I thought you were funny, interesting, I still do.” Sicheng could feel the funny fuzzy feeling on his stomach growing, Yuta never failed to make him feel good. “But I can’t believe you got mad at that! You are such a kid.” And just like that the sweet smile was replaced by a grin, Yuta completely killing the romantic mood by making fun of him.

 

Sicheng grumbled, pushing the other away with all his force, using his weight and making them both fall on the sofa, him on top of Yuta, locking him up against the sofa. “You are the worst.”

 

“Is that so?” He could feel Yuta’s hands making its way to his waist, stopping there with a grip firm, to keep him in place.

 

“Do you want to hear something even more embarrassing?” Sicheng had already confessed half of the truth, thinking maybe it wouldn’t hurt so much to just spill everything.

 

“Is it more embarrassing than me being called roasted chicken during college?” Yuta was pulling Sicheng body even closer than possible, letting his whole weight fall on him. The position was making things to Sicheng’s mind, he was feeling every single part of Yuta’s body against his, all the firmness of the other’s toned body pressed under his own. It was hard to focus when he was – literally – all over a hot guy.

 

“Maybe.” Sicheng tried to adjust himself on top of Yuta, making sure his face would get closer to the other - enough to be able to steal a quick kiss, which he did it. “Do you know New Year’s resolutions?” Yuta did his best to nod in his position. “I was so mad at you that I promised myself I wouldn’t get involved with anyone this year.” As soon as he finished talking Yuta started laughing, his whole body trembling because of it and Sicheng felt everything, making him unable to stay serious and not join him.

 

“Oh my god, you hated me!” Underneath him Yuta was grinning, having the time of his life with the confession. “What made you change your mind?”

 

One of Sicheng’s hand went down to the man’s stomach, resting there. He was pretty sure he could feel some abs. “You are really hot.” It wasn’t all lies, but it was just a small portion of the truth, but enough to make Yuta briefly laugh again.

 

“Thanks, but aren’t you breaking your resolution right now?”

 

“Pretty much.” Sicheng shrugged. There was no way he could argue anymore. “Can’t wait for the universe to get back at me for it.”

 

“Oh. Now I feel bad. Is my fault, so maybe I should make it up to you.” Sicheng arched his brows in confusion at what Yuta meant, but soon he was smiling as the other placed a quick kiss on his lips.

 

“And what do you plan on doing it?”

 

“I have an idea.” Yuta pressed his lips against Sicheng’s in between every word, making giggle. 

 

Sicheng didn’t really care if the universe decided to punish him later. All he could think was that, maybe, some resolutions were meant to be broken.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is the shortest chapter so far and still gave me so much trouble...... Fun fact: when i first planned the plot the story didnt include Renjun's accident and by the end of chapter three Sicheng would go to Yuta's house. Chapter four would be the last, with them talking the next day and pretty much the same ending as you just read it. Buuuut I liked the characters and didn't want to end so fast, so I tried to come up with a little longer plot haha three more chapters to go now :P  
> Anyway, maybe updates will be a slower from now on, real life is knocking on my door right now. See ya~


	5. Chapter 5

 

Sicheng and Renjun were huge fans of weird television reality shows.

 

A show about people who eat weird things? Love it. People who marry unanimated objects? Yes, please. Coupon shopping? A must.

 

So after spending five hours cleaning and organizing the house - only to find four sets of never used plastic containers – and being nowhere near to finish, Sicheng knew he and Renjun were heading straight to their own episode of hording shows.

 

He had no idea they owned so much stuff. So much useless stuff to be specific. Why the hell Renjun needed two banana cases? Sicheng thought he never even saw Renjun buy a banana before.

 

Truth is, normally when cleaning the apartment none of the brothers would dig so deep into their drawers and cabinets. They cleaned the house, but never so fervently. During any normal weekend they would just do their routine cleaning and it was perfect.

 

But that wasn’t a normal weekend. Far from it.

 

Because that Saturday night Yuta was coming to their apartment for the first time for dinner – and probably spend the night as well.

 

It had been a week since their second date at Yuta’s house. The date was perfect. They talked for hours and opened up to each other not only emotionally but also physically.

 

For the first time in forever, Sicheng was really happy with a relationship. Being with Yuta felt good and he counted the seconds to see the other again. They spent the week exchanging messages, phone calls and – most important – planning a third date on Sicheng’s house.

 

Bringing someone to his house was something out of the ordinarily for Sicheng. It was his first time letting someone he was going out with set foot on his house. His first batch of relationships were during high school and his parents were against him bringing his boyfriend home. Later in college his room at the dorms was so small it was easier to stay at the other person’s place. Now, living with Renjun, Sicheng just didn’t feel comfortable bringing anyone to their house.

 

The decision to have a date at his house was a spurt of the moment kind of thought. Yuta was already proposing another date at his house, maybe watch a movie together and finally order from pizza hut.

 

The truth is: there was no need to have a date at Sicheng’s house.

 

But hours earlier their conversation, Renjun had told Sicheng he would spend the weekend at Mark’s house to finish a project for one of their shared classes in college. The memory crossed Sicheng’s mind as he was talking on the phone with Yuta and, before he could think straight, he proposed that their third date should be at his house.

 

Probably one of the dumbest decisions of his life.

 

As much as Sicheng wanted to pretend that he was only nervous because he didn’t want Yuta to think the worst out of him thanks to his house – after all the boring comments about the other’s house he knew his would be judged in return -, he knew deep down that his problem laid in a more emotional level.

 

In the past year all his relationships failed. _God_ , for the past _couple of years_ to be more exact.

 

It didn’t matter who he tried to date. From fellow dancers with crazy hair colors to serious lawyers dressed in perfectly fitted suits. No one ever stayed. No one fell for Sicheng.

 

He was always the only one falling, getting attached to guys who only wanted casual sex or didn’t like him back – save from some rare occasions where both parties agreed that they weren’t a match -. Sicheng was tired of the heartbreaks, just as much as he was tired of being alone.

 

And most importantly, he was scared of where things were heading with Yuta.

 

They had been to two dates already, he went and stayed over the other’s house and – heck – he even introduced Renjun to him. For many people that would be enough reason to sit down and talk about their relationship, what both parties were expecting.

 

The problem was that everything happened in less than a week and in the messiest order possible. Their relationship was anything but normal and Sicheng had no idea what to do. He knew it was way too early for some relationship discussion, but he also knew it was too early to catch feelings.

 

However, there he was completely enamored with Yuta; his heart beating faster with every message and phone call. He felt dumb for falling so fast after such a short period of time.

 

And he felt even dumber for opening the doors to his house to Yuta. To let him inside his home, to his private and sacred place.

 

So Sicheng kept repeating inside his head that he was nervous and insecure because of the dumb shine-in-the-dark skeleton he and Renjun kept inside the brooms closet. Not because he was letting someone who could potentially break his heart enter his house, taint his space with his presence.

 

Heartbreaks are already hard enough without having to look at your bed and remember the time you and your ex had sex and cuddle there. Jungwoo had cried about it way too many times for Sicheng to forget. 

 

Unfortunately for Sicheng it was already too late. He did it, he invited Yuta over. They were going to have dinner together in his living room and later have sex in his bedroom, forever tainting his purple bedsheets.

 

 _Perfect_.

 

Sicheng shook his head, trying his best to push all those delightful thoughts to the back of his head, just like he was trying to push all the rest of his mess inside a small cabinet in his wardrobe since he was running out of time.

 

The apartment was still far from looking like a model house, but Sicheng thought he did a good job in five hours. His mind was still a mess, but the apartment definitely no longer looked like it was worth a hoarders’ episode.

 

Renjun had left long before he even started cleaning, so that was another problem out of the way. The only thing left for Sicheng to do was to take a shower and make himself look presentable, _datable_.  He had around one hour and half to get ready before Yuta arrived.

 

And a shower was just what he needed to calm his nerves down. Spend half of his available time just under the running water, letting it take away all those – not so – dumb fears.

 

Sicheng was determined to use his time to put himself together. Everything was ok. He was ok.

 

Half way to the bathroom, he heard his phone beep indicating a new message. Sicheng could look at it later, but maybe it was just Jaehyun or Jungwoo asking for updates, for news, maybe Ten _screaming_ at him for it. Either way, he was ok, nothing bad was going to happen just because he checked his phone. Turning around on his way, Sicheng went to the nightstand beside his bed, where his phone was. He grabbed the electronic, unlocking the screen and clicking on the new message.

 

 **_Yuta  
_ ** _Don’t order anything, I’m gonna bring pizza with me, ok?_

_Also, is there anything you need or want? I can buy it on my way to your house._

 

By the end of the message Sicheng had a dumb smile on his lips and his heart had started beating a lot faster with how sweet Yuta was. It took him longer than a second to notice how he was reacting over just a simple text message. That wasn’t good, he was falling way too fast.

 

Another beep, another message.

 

 **_Yuta  
_ ** _Can’t wait to see you._

 

Against his better judgment, the smile on his lips grew larger.

 

He was screwed.

✦ ✦ ✦  
  
 

Sicheng had just finished fluffing the cushions, placing it in a perfect order of bigger to smaller on the sofa, when the doorbell rang.

 

Yuta sent him a message a few minutes prior telling him he would arrive in ten minutes, so Sicheng had enough time for a few final touches on the apartment. He wasn’t still one hundred percent satisfied with how it looked, but at least he was able to get rid of all the embarrassing crap he and Renjun hoarded over the years.

 

He walked towards the entrance door while taking a deep breath, trying to calm himself and remember it was just another date, another night together – maybe, he still wasn’t sure if Yuta was going to spend the night -. Yuta being in his house wasn’t a big deal, it was just a casual date. He wasn’t going to freak out, he could do it.

 

Sicheng didn’t expect anything less than perfection on the other side of the door. And there it was. Looking like he came straight from a casual fashion editorial, handsome as ever, Yuta stood in front of his door, carrying a pizza box in one hand and a supermarket plastic bag in another.

 

A hot guy and good food at your door, the definition of a dream.

 

“Hey, did you order a pizza?” Yuta joked, smiling at him. The best thing about Yuta’s smile was that it made Sicheng amazingly comfortable, all his fears and insecurities flying over the window.           

 

“Yes, but I asked for the cutest delivery guy…” He couldn’t help but joke back, he loved the sound of Yuta’s laugh after all. “Let me help you with that.” Sicheng pointed at the food, quickly moving to get the pizza box from the other’s hand, helping him out and ready to take the food inside.

 

As soon as Yuta got a free hand, he used to hug Sicheng by the waist, bringing him closer in the best way he could without the pizza staying between them. “Let me proper greet you before anything.” He presses his lips against Sicheng’s, kissing him.

 

It was a brief kiss, enough for a greeting, but still made Sicheng itching for more.   

 

Even after they broke the kiss their bodies stayed pressed against each other. Sicheng thought how it was a little embarrassing how whipped he was for Yuta, not wanting to break apart from him.

 

“So… Are having dinner at your doorstep or you are going to invite me in?” Yuta destroyed the mood with his dumb comment.

 

Sicheng wheezed as he finally snapped out of his thoughts, freeing himself from the other’s embrace. He opened the door a little wider, enough for Yuta to pass by him and enter the apartment. “You know delivery guys are not supposed to enter a client house?”

 

Yuta grinned at him as he took his shoes off. “Actually, according to porn I’m.” Sicheng snorted.

 

 “Please don’t get naked on my sofa.”

 

“No promises!” Yuta laughed and Sicheng hoped he was still joking; Renjun would kill him if they tainted the sacredness of their sofa. Yuta put his shoes aside on the entrance with his one free hand, then holding the plastic bag up. “Where should I put this?”

 

“Oh, it’s food, right?” Sicheng guessed and Yuta nodded. “Then let’s just leave it in the kitchen.” As cue, Sicheng turned around and started walking down the corridor, followed close by Yuta, making their way to the kitchen. “My place is small compared to yours, but feel free to explore.” The corridor ended on the living room and Sicheng started with his apartment tour. “This is the living room, obviously, the door on the right side it’s the bathroom and the little corridor besides it takes to my and Renjun’s room. Kitchen is on the left and… Yeah, this is it!” No huge backyard, no balcony. Just a simple two rooms apartment.

 

They turned left on a door frame and entered the kitchen, Sicheng leaving the pizza on the counter top and turning to Yuta to get the plastic bag from his hand. “I’m going to cut the pizza and get the plates, you can wait in the living room if you want, explore the apartment… Just please keep your clothes on.”

 

“Let’s see if you are going to keep saying this when it’s time for bed.” Yuta grinned at him, winking and Sicheng felt his cheeks heating up. He should have seen that one coming. Yuta kissed his blushing cheek, laughing at his reaction. “I will leave my backpack in your bedroom, ok?” Sicheng only nodded and Yuta left the kitchen.

 

The first thing that crossed Sicheng’s mind as he found himself alone as the mental confirmation that yes, just like he believed, Yuta was going to spend the night at his house.

 

And as realization sank in - for what it felt like the thousand time in one day - Sicheng had to take a deep breath and convince himself mentally that everything would be ok.

 

He would be fine. He just had to stop overthinking and just go with the flow, enjoy the company of the hottest man alive inside his apartment.

 

Thanks to his small internal debate, Sicheng took more time than necessary to cut the pizza, get the plates and a few napkins. Balancing everything on his hands, he headed back to the living room.

 

Yuta was already there, standing in front of a wall where some photos were hanging. That was a special wall where Sicheng and Renjun choose to hang only photos of some of their fondest and funniest memories. A few photos were beyond weird, so Sicheng knew Yuta was probably very confused at some of the things he was seeing.

 

Quickly leaving the pizza and the rest of the things on the small table in front of the sofa, Sicheng walked over to the other, noticing him staring at a photo of him and his friends – everyone minus Doyoung, who they still didn’t know at the time – on a Halloween party during their university years.

 

“I’m intrigued.” Was the first comment to come out of Yuta’s lips, eyes still glued on the photo.

 

“People normally feel like this when looking at a masterpiece.” Sicheng joked before starting to explain what he felt – _knew_ – was the best photo in the wall. “We were in our first year of university and there was this Halloween party with a costume contest-”

 

“The beginning of every great story, I see.” Yuta interrupted him, chuckling.

 

“As I was saying! There was a costume contest, but I didn’t really care about it until Jungwoo-“ He pointed at him in the photo; as much as Sicheng had already told Yuta about his friends and their stories, it was Yuta’s first time seeing Jungwoo and Ten’s face. “-announced that him and Jaehyun were going to do a couple costume. And Jae, that little asshole, started bragging about how him and Jungwoo were couple goals, that me and Taeil were basic, boring.”

 

“Oh my god, you have this boring complex since university.” Yuta couldn’t help but laugh, but there was suddenly a finger pressed on his lips, attempting to silence him.

 

“Shhhh! Listen!” Sicheng tried to sound serious, only making Yuta laugh even more. “So, I couldn’t let it pass. Me and Taeil had to be coolest couple ever! We had to win the contest!” Yuta nodded, not daring to make a comment and interrupt again. “We thought really hard about it and decided that we needed something shocking, daring! So, we just knew crossdressing was the way to go… But unfortunately Jaehyun and Jungwoo thought the same- For god’s sake, even Ten-“ He pointed at him in the photo. “-thought the same! And that’s how we ended up with Beauty and the Beast meets Titanic and the Mona Lisa. Three crossdressers, one monster and a Leonardo Dicaprio wannabe. The weirdest group in the party and yet none of us won the contest!” With the story finally done, Sicheng looked at the other, grinning at him and quietly listening. “You can make comments now.”

 

Yuta stopped to think for a second, looking to the photo and Sicheng, back and forth. “Should I be concerned that you have a photo with your ex on your wall?” His question completely caught Sicheng off-guard.

 

“What? I tell you the most ridiculous story and this is what you focus on?” While a part of Sicheng was surprised by the question, he was mostly curious on _why_ Yuta would question this. Why would he be concerned? Was he jealous of Taeil? Scared that Sicheng still liked his ex? Annoyed that he had kept photos with his ex?

 

They never talked about their past relationships, _god_ , they didn’t even talk about their own relationship. And if Sicheng really thought about it, they didn’t even have a relationship per say. They were going out on dates, getting to know each other and – as far as he knew – they weren’t exclusive.

 

Why was Yuta concerned over his ex?

 

Sicheng was trying really hard to not overthink, but it was so hard with Yuta dropping bombs like that, messing with his head and heart.

 

“Should I focus on your makeup and hair?” Yuta smirked, making fun of him. And just like that all of Sicheng insecurities were forgotten for another second.

 

“Rude! In my own house?” The smirk never left Yuta’s lips.

 

“Oh, so you want me to judge your house then?” And there it was. Sicheng knew it was coming, he knew Yuta would have his revenge for all the boring comments he once made about his huge boring house.

 

But Sicheng was ready; he cleaned the place like never, he organized. He was damn ready. “Bring it on!”

 

To his entire surprise Yuta’s smirk turned into a soft smile. “Your house is just like you. Is cute.” That wasn’t what Sicheng was expecting, that wasn’t revenge. “Now, seeing your house, I completely understand why you don’t like my place.”

 

“I never said I didn’t like your house!” Sicheng was quick to defend himself. He hated the décor, the house itself was ok, it just needed some color and personal items to make more homie in his opinion. Yuta shook his head, still smiling.

 

“It’s ok, I get it now.” He looked around, taking in all the details of the colorful apartment. “It doesn’t matter where I look, I see you. And your brother as well, but mostly you. This is obviously your house, everything inside reflects who you are and what you love. I like it.”

 

Yuta was talking about his house, but Sicheng couldn’t help but dissect his words. If his house was like him and Yuta liked his house, did that meant he liked him? Was that an indirect confession?

 

Or was Yuta just saying that in a “ _hey, I like the blue curtains_ ” kind of way? Sicheng wasn’t sure.

 

“I will like it even more when we take a photo together on Halloween and you hang it on this wall. Your ex got nothing on me crossdressing.” Yuta joked and Sicheng laughed in reflex.

 

His brain was by now almost overheating because of all the thoughts going through his mind.

 

Halloween was ten months away. Yuta was planning to stay with him for that long? As friends? Fuck buddies? He didn’t explicit, but in the photo Sicheng and Taeil were a couple, so was – once again – Yuta implying something? Did he meant they would be a couple?

 

Sicheng could feel the start of a headache coming.

 

Nakamoto Yuta was going to be the death of him.

 

✦ ✦ ✦  
  
 

The first time Sicheng slept with Yuta, he was blessed to wake up tangled in the other’s arms, being spooned by him. It was warm, comfortable and it made Sicheng feel very good on the inside, really happy.

 

Thus, it made sense that he was expecting and waiting for that delightful moment when he would wake up in the arms of the hottest man he ever met, maybe cuddle some more and exchange a few pecks on the lips before finally getting out of bed.

 

But that was not what Sicheng woke up to in that morning.

 

The first thing he noticed when he woke up was the lack of a warm body pressed against his. No one was holding him close, no hug, not even a hand holding his. Nothing.

 

Sicheng rolled around in bed, hoping to see Yuta sleeping on the other side of the bed, just a little far away from him.

 

Again, nothing.

 

He was completely alone in bed. The free space beside him was even cold, indicating Yuta had left the bed a long time ago. Maybe minutes, hours. Maybe he didn’t even sleep at his house, running away in the middle of the night after Sicheng fell asleep.

 

That was it: Sicheng’s biggest nightmare was coming true. He trusted Yuta, he let himself dream of their future together with a beautiful house and a dog. He was dumb enough to believe they were going to be together and now he was used, left behind. He would never be able to look at his bed again without thinking of all the things they did it together the night before, all the sweet nothings Yuta whispered on his ear.

 

Sicheng was devastated, sad, how could he be so dumb, so innocent-

 

The loud sound of something falling on the floor took Sicheng out of his thoughts. The noise coming from outside his room.

 

Maybe Yuta only left the bed because he woke up. But just maybe.

 

Sicheng almost fell of bed, getting tangled in the blankets on his way out. He needed to get out, to see with his own eyes that Yuta was still there. He was just sleepy and not thinking straight, there was no reason to be so scared, to think the worst. Yuta never gave him reasons to think like that, the contrary actually.

 

With fast steps, Sicheng went to the bedroom door, taking a deep breath and opening. The noises coming from outside got louder. Now not only he was able to hear what sounded like popcorn being made in the microwave, but he also heard voices.

 

As in the plural.

 

Who the hell was in his house?

 

Sicheng didn’t care he was still in his pajamas and with bed-hair, a whole morning mess. He started walking towards the kitchen and recognized Yuta’s voice as he spoke.

 

Truth is, Sicheng didn’t know exactly what he was expecting to find in his kitchen. It was his house and, as far as he knew, it was morning. Who the hell was in his house on an unholy Sunday morning talking with his wish-it-was-my-boyfriend?

 

And from all the possible alternatives, Sicheng really should have thought of the most obvious one.

 

Yuta was leaning against the kitchen counter, still in his pajamas and finishing eating one of the leftover pizza slices. He listened to Renjun – who stood on the other side of the kitchen, waiting for his popcorn to stop popping – as he told him some of his weird college party stories.

 

A story that Sicheng never heard of it because Renjun didn’t tell him those things. But he was telling Yuta, who he met only once.

 

_What the fuck?_

 

Renjun was the first to notice him, stopping his story telling so he could snort at his brother. “Look who finally woke up!” Sicheng ignored his brother snarky comment, still standing at the kitchen door, looking from his brother to Yuta, completely confused to what was going on there.

 

“Why are you here?” His mushy morning brain couldn’t understand why Renjun was there, he was supposed to be Mark’s house for the whole weekend.

 

“I live here.” Another snarky and sarcastic remark. Sicheng was ready to repeat the question when he felt arms circling around his waist, hugging him. His body stiffened, stare going straight towards Renjun, who didn’t seem to care that he was watching Sicheng being a little intimate with someone. He didn’t even flinch when Yuta pressed a small kiss on Sicheng’s cheek.

 

“Good morning, or should I say good evening?” Yuta was still so close that Sicheng could feel the vibrations of his every word against his skin. As good as it felt to be in the other’s arms, his eyes were still glued on Renjun.

 

The stare was clearly freaking out his brother, who mouthed a “ _why are you looking at me?!”._ He took his popcorn from inside the microwave, dropping everything on a bowl and leaving the kitchen with it, running away from Sicheng’s stare.  

 

Sicheng didn’t know how he really expected Renjun to react. For all their years living together, he never introduced anyone to his brother. Years and years avoiding the – what he believed it was – awkward situation. The night Renjun broke his arm was an unavoidable mistake, something that would never happen if Sicheng had fully control of the situation. This morning was another of those moments where he was unable to prevent the two from meeting, from interacting. It was an uncomfortable situation in his eyes.

 

However, he felt like he was the only one who thought like that now.

 

Neither Renjun nor Yuta seemed uncomfortable or awkward around each other, the contrary: they were talking, laughing with each other. Things only turned weird when he came and made it that way, staring at his brother and scaring him away.

 

He knew he tended to overthink things, so maybe this time the universe was sending a message that it was ok, that he didn’t need to worry too much.

 

But then again, the last time he thought the universe was sending him a message he was wrong. Absurdly wrong.

 

“Did you fall asleep?” Sicheng felt Yuta smiling against his cheek before kissing it again, taking him out of his thoughts.

 

Maybe he should really just focus on the amazing guy willing to put it up with his weird self.

 

“Just thinking too much.” He answered truthfully, finally getting himself comfortable in the other’s arm, resting his head on his shoulder. “For how long have you been awake? Why did you not wake me up?”

 

Yuta kissed him again, this time on the top of his head. “I think for one hour and half? Two hours max… I just didn’t have the courage to wake you, you looked so relaxed. I stayed in bed for a while, but got up when I started getting hungry.” Sicheng hummed. It made sense, if he woke up earlier than Yuta he would probably have done the same. “I thought about cooking breakfast for you, bring to bed, you know?”

 

Sicheng smiled, it sounded lovely. “Why didn’t you?”

 

“I actually started! Was frying some eggs when I got distracted by some messages on my cellphone… Your brother arrived to find me on my phone, standing beside the stove while my eggs turned black.” Sicheng tried to hold back his laughter, burying his face on Yuta’s neck. “He screamed at me to back away from the stove and don’t dare touch his pans again.” Hearing about Renjun’s reaction was the last straw for him, finally laughing out loud.

 

“I can’t believe _you_ made such a dumb mistake!” The words came out while still laughing.

 

“I don’t know if I should be offended or flattered…?” Yuta chuckled.

 

Sicheng backed away a little from the other, enough so he could give him a peck on the lips. “I’m just glad you are not perfect.”

 

“Far from it. I thought it was obvious after my frat boy roasted chicken story?” It was Yuta who then pecked Sicheng’s lips, smiling. “But yeah, after throwing the eggs away and washing the pan, your brother convinced me that you weren’t going to wake up gracefully enough for breakfast in bed, too slow and gross in the morning, it wouldn’t be romantic.”

 

“I’m going to break that kid’s other arm.” Sicheng made mention to move out of Yuta’s arms and go kill his brother, but he was only hugged tighter. Stuck in place, he hit Yuta in the chest, indignant. “And how dare you believe him?!”

 

“Gotta believe my little pal Renjun!” Yuta’s response got him a snort from Sicheng. Little pal Renjun? He was starting to have second thoughts on how good it was that his brother and maybe-future-boyfriend actually hit off well. “Are you hungry? I may not be allowed to cook in this house anymore, but I can still reheat pizza.”

 

“It’s ok, I’m not really hungry right now.” Sicheng buried his face on Yuta’s neck again. “I just feel like doing nothing.” Perhaps it was all the overthinking that got him so tired, he didn’t know for sure. Even after a good and long night of sleep, he still felt like he could sleep a few more hours or just lazy around in bed for the whole day.

 

Preferentially with Yuta.

 

“Then we can just lay on the sofa, watch something… Steal your brother’s popcorn.” Sicheng smiled. It sounded like the perfect Sunday.

 

“I like this idea.” His answer was all Yuta needed to hear to break their hug apart, hands still on Sicheng’s body as he pulled him to the living room.

 

Renjun was already laying on the sofa, taking up almost all the space, as he watched television and grabbed a few handfuls of popcorn from the bowl he balanced on top of his chest.

 

Seeing his brother on the sofa made - for a slight second - the anxious thoughts return to Sicheng’s mind. The idea of cuddling on the sofa with Yuta, right in front of Renjun, the possible awkward situation that would come with-

 

“This woman drinks air freshener.” Renjun’s voice cut Sicheng’s line of thoughts, his eyes and full attention going straight to the television screen, where a woman sprayed air freshener on her mouth.

 

 _God_ , how much he loved weird reality television.

 

His brother sat up on the sofa, making space for both him and Yuta to sit down as well. They sat in silence and Yuta once again hugged Sicheng’s body, bringing him close enough to lean his head on his shoulder.

 

The woman on the screen kept talking about how much she drank air freshener in a week, then trying to convince her fiancé to drink it too.

 

Watching the scene with complete horror, Yuta was unable to stay quiet, finally breaking the silence. “Why is she doing this? He is not going to drin- Oh, he drank.” Sicheng snorted beside him. It was clearly Yuta’s first time watching such program, too shocked, an obvious contrast with the Dong brothers’ years of religiously watching it.

 

“That’s true love.” Sicheng replied, getting a disgusted grunt from both Renjun and Yuta.

 

“If that’s true love I hope I die single.” Renjun said, filling his mouth with popcorn soon after.

 

“I’m concerned if you think that’s true love.” It was impossible for Sicheng to not laugh at Yuta’s concern.

 

“Nothing sexier than a man who will poison himself for you.” He joked.

 

“So… Lemon scent or apple cinnamon?” Yuta pinched the sides of Sicheng’s body, making him squirm under his touch, both giggling.

 

“I correct myself: if _this_ is real love, I hope I die single.” Renjun said as he threw popcorn at them, making Yuta laugh and Sicheng’s heart beat a little faster.

 

Using true love to describe his relationship with Yuta was too much for his poor heart. However, in the middle of all the chaos inside his mind and heart, he couldn’t help but be a little happy.

 

Was that how people saw him and Yuta? How they looked like when together? In love?

 

“I bet you will find someone that will make you drink a full cup of air freshener for them.” Another few popcorns were thrown in Yuta’s direction.

 

“No, Renjun is more of an eat clay masks type of guy.” This time the popcorns hit Sicheng’s face.

 

“Can you please not?!”

 

“Is this a reference for another episode?” Yuta asked in confusion.

 

“Yes, I think we have watched almost all episodes at this point.” Sicheng stopped to think about it. Him and his brother really watched a lot of shows and episodes, probably most of it that has aired.

 

“I see… Any recommendations? What I should start watching it?” Yuta’s question caught Sicheng off-guard. Yuta wanted to watch his weird television shows?

 

And then it hit Sicheng: the same way the air freshener drinker woman’s fiancé was willing to drink some for her, Yuta was willing to watch his shows for him.

 

For love.

 

His mind was doing a full work around the subject, long gone from the conversation at the sofa – Renjun recommending his favorite episodes of My Strange Addiction and a few from Hoarders as well to Yuta -.

 

They only knew each other for less than a month, was it possible for Yuta to already love him? Or at least want to love him? Maybe just like him in a very strong way? After all, the man gave nothing but huge hints of interest and hopes of a relationship, so it wasn’t wrong or crazy of Sicheng to expect something more, right?

 

Sicheng didn’t even notice he had turned his head to the side to stare at Yuta until he was caught doing it. “Is there something on my face?”

 

He panicked. He needed a reason, an answer, anything to not making him admit he was crazy and overthinking their whole relationship.

 

“Just thinking about air freshener.” _Smooth,_ Sicheng, really smooth.

 

Yuta’s expression twitched in disgust. “Oh god, Renjun, make space on your side, I’m sitting with you.” He then made notion to leave, but Sicheng promptly hugged his body back, preventing him from moving.

 

“I reject myself from sitting beside the two of you.” Renjun adjusted himself on the sofa, so he could be sitting a little further away from them.

 

Renjun and Yuta started and kept on bickering with each other, with more popcorn flying over Sicheng’s head from time to time, making a mess on the living room floor and sofa.

 

After spending the whole day prior cleaning the apartment, normally Sichend would be annoyed with the mess they were making it. But he didn’t care, he didn’t even care about all the popcorn getting caught on his hair.

 

All he cared, thought, about it was Yuta. The perfect man hugging by the waist, head resting on his shoulder. Who took him on amazing dates, watched his shows and got along well with his baby brother.

 

The man who made his poor heart beat in a speed that was probably not healthy enough, bearing a heart attack, but also made him nervous and overthink more than he was used to. It was all ok though, because the sound of Yuta’s sweet words and compliments was louder than the fears in his head.

 

He still had no idea what they were, what was happening or what the future held for them. But in the middle of all his fears and bad expectations, there was only one thing Sicheng was sure of it.

 

He liked Yuta. A lot.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M ALIIIIIIIIIIIIVE /inserts here an elmo on fire gif please/  
> Oh god, what a mess, I'm so sorry for taking so long to update! This whole one month and half was awful, things got busier than i expected and even when I had a little time to write, things just didn't come out the way I wanted, I got stuck in the some paragraphs for yeeeeeears and ugh  
> So yeah, I did my full re-read the chapter and try to find mistakes thing, corrected the ones i found, but I know there is still many out there, I'm sorry ): i kept editing this fic all the time because i'm always finding mistakes on it, some are horrifying like how did that get unnoticed???????????????????  
> But yeah, hope you guys enjoyed the chapter! Sorry again for taking so long, I suck, I know


End file.
